Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
love bombing, nyc therapist, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you. 

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

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The Difference Between Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) vs Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS)

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The Difference Between Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) vs Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS)

Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) and Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS) are often mentioned interchangeably, but understanding the distinction is crucial, especially for mental health awareness. While PMS is relatively common and typically involves mild emotional and physical symptoms like irritability, bloating, and fatigue, PMDD is a far more severe condition that can significantly disrupt daily life. 

Women with PMDD may experience intense mood swings, debilitating anxiety, deep sadness, and even thoughts of hopelessness, often in the week leading up to menstruation. Recognizing these differences is key to seeking appropriate support and treatment rather than dismissing the symptoms as “just part of being a woman.”

From a mental health perspective, PMDD is not simply a hormonal inconvenience, it is a serious mood disorder with major impacts. The emotional and cognitive symptoms can mimic or exacerbate conditions like depression and anxiety, making timely diagnosis and intervention essential. Raising awareness about PMDD helps reduce stigma and empowers those affected to access mental health care, explore coping strategies, and find relief. Understanding the difference between PMS and PMDD is the first step toward validating the lived experiences of those who face this challenging condition each month.

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Living with Emotional Numbness After Trauma

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Living with Emotional Numbness After Trauma

For many survivors of trauma, the world does not just simply feel different, it actually feels muted. Emotions that once came easily may now seem distant or entirely absent, leaving a sense of disconnection from oneself and others. This emotional numbness is a common but often misunderstood symptom of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), a protective response of the brain designed to shield us from overwhelming pain. While it may feel like a relief in the short term, over time, the inability to feel joy, sadness, or even anger can create its own form of suffering, affecting relationships, daily life, and self-perception.

Living with emotional numbness can be confusing and isolating. You might find yourself watching life pass by from behind a fog, unsure if what you are experiencing is “normal” or permanent. Yet, it is important to know that emotional numbness is not a personal failing. Instead, it is a signal from your nervous system that it needs safety, time, and gentle care. Understanding why this numbness occurs and learning strategies to reconnect with your emotions are critical steps toward reclaiming a sense of vitality and engagement in your life.

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Effective Strategies to Manage OCD at School

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Effective Strategies to Manage OCD at School

Navigating school can be challenging for any student, but for those living with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), the academic environment often presents unique hurdles. From managing intrusive thoughts during class to handling compulsions in social settings, students with OCD may feel overwhelmed, isolated, or misunderstood. These challenges can impact not only academic performance but also emotional well-being and peer relationships. The good news? With the right tools, support systems, and coping strategies in place, students with OCD can thrive in school.

At Anchor Therapy, we work closely with students, parents, and educators to create supportive environments that reduce anxiety and encourage healthy coping. In this blog, we will explore practical strategies for managing OCD symptoms throughout the school day, from preparing in the morning to handling difficult moments in the classroom. Whether you are a student, parent, or school professional, these tools can help build resilience, foster independence, and promote success both inside and outside the classroom.

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What Is Claustrophobia Caused By?

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What Is Claustrophobia Caused By?

Claustrophobia, the intense fear of confined or enclosed spaces, affects millions of people worldwide and can trigger panic attacks, anxiety, and even physical symptoms like sweating or rapid heartbeat. Check out our blog “3 Ways to Manage Your Physical Anxiety Symptoms.” But what actually causes this fear to take hold? While every individual’s experience is unique, experts believe claustrophobia often stems from a combination of genetic, psychological, and environmental factors. Some people may be more biologically prone to anxiety disorders, while others might develop the fear after a traumatic event, such as being trapped in a small space or experiencing a frightening situation in childhood.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, one in eight adults may have this phobia or roughly 12.5% of the adult population in the United States. In many cases, claustrophobia develops early in life and becomes more pronounced over time. The brain's fear response can become overly sensitive, reacting strongly even in mildly enclosed spaces like elevators or crowded rooms. Learned behavior may also play a role- if a person witnesses someone else showing fear in a confined space, they may internalize that response themselves. Ultimately, understanding the root causes of claustrophobia is the first step toward managing it, whether through working with a phobia counselor at Anchor Therapy, exposure techniques, or self-guided strategies to reduce anxiety.

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What Are Signs of the Fawning Response?

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What Are Signs of the Fawning Response?

When we talk about trauma responses, most people are familiar with fight, flight, or freeze. But there is another lesser-known reaction called fawning- a survival mechanism where a person seeks to appease others to avoid conflict, criticism, or harm. This often looks like people-pleasing, over-apologizing, or abandoning personal needs in order to maintain peace or feel safe. While it may appear as kindness or agreeableness on the surface, fawning can be a deep-rooted response to past emotional or relational trauma.

Recognizing the signs of a fawning response is essential for anyone working on setting healthier boundaries or healing from trauma. From difficulty saying “no” to constantly anticipating others’ needs, the behaviors linked to fawning often go unnoticed because they are socially rewarded. In this post, we will explore the key indicators of the fawning response, why it develops, and how awareness is the first step toward reclaiming your authentic self.

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How To Deal With A Child With OCD

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How To Deal With A Child With OCD

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) can be deeply distressing for both the child or teen experiencing it and the family supporting them. At Anchor Therapy, our OCD therapists often meet parents who feel overwhelmed, confused, or even helpless as they try to understand their child's behaviors whether it is constant hand-washing, repeated questioning, or an intense need for things to be "just right." OCD in children can show up differently than in adults and early intervention is key to helping them manage the intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors that interfere with daily life.

Supporting a child with OCD requires more than just patience- it calls for informed, compassionate strategies that balance empathy with structure. From a therapeutic standpoint, we emphasize the importance of understanding the disorder, recognizing what is driven by anxiety versus defiance, and learning tools that empower both child and parent. In this blog, we will explore how to approach OCD with clarity and confidence, including how mental health counseling can support lasting change and provide relief for the whole family system.

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Coping with the Trauma of the July 2025 NYC Mass Shooting

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Coping with the Trauma of the July 2025 NYC Mass Shooting

The mass shooting that struck New York City in July 2025 left more than physical devastation- it tore through the emotional core of the city. As news broke and sirens echoed across boroughs, countless lives were instantly changed. For survivors, witnesses, families, and even those watching from afar, the psychological impact has been profound. In the days and weeks since, many are grappling with feelings of fear, helplessness, grief, and a shaken sense of safety in their everyday lives. Read our blog “How Does Grief Affect Your Identity?”. 

Trauma from events like these does not fade just because the headlines do. It lingers in unexpected moments, such as loud noises, crowded spaces, or the quiet isolation of sleepless nights. Whether you were directly affected or emotionally impacted from a distance, this post explores what trauma can look like, why it is normal to feel disoriented or overwhelmed, and how to begin taking small but meaningful steps toward healing. You are not alone and your pain is valid.

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