Scapegoating in Families, Scapegoat, nj therapist, nyc counselor, nyc therapist
Courtney Glashow
What To Do When Someone Is Using You As A ...

While everyone suffers and goes through uncomfortable situations from time-to-time, that does not mean that you should be left to suffer. In a scapegoating situation, you as the scapegoat are the one who assumes responsibility on behalf of someone else. This is not a voluntary position that you offer, instead it is pushed upon you. 

Scapegoating can occur in many different environments. Most commonly, people discuss scapegoating dynamics within families. For more information, read our blog “Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families.” In families, a scapegoat can be unfairly blamed for conflicts within the family.

With that being said, scapegoating can occur in other relationships as well. At work, an employee or group of workers may be blamed for company-wide or organizational problems. At school, a student may be targeted for classroom concerns. Within communities, certain people may be blamed for widespread social problems. Regardless of the setting, the act of scapegoating is always used to intentionally shift blame and avoid addressing the reality of a situation and the actual issues at-hand.

What To Do When Someone Is Using You As A Scapegoat
Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
love bombing, nyc therapist, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you. 

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right

career counseling for healthcare workers

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10 Type A Personality Traits That Drive Success

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10 Type A Personality Traits That Drive Success

If you have ever been described as competitive, driven, or always “on the go,” you might recognize yourself in the world of Type A personalities. Known for their ambition, focus, and relentless pursuit of goals, individuals with strong Type A personality traits often stand out in high-performance environments. They set high standards, manage their time carefully, and rarely shy away from a challenge. But what exactly makes these traits so powerful and how do they translate into real-world success?

In this blog, we will explore 10 Type A personality traits that drive success, from unwavering determination to exceptional organizational skills. Whether you identify as Type A yourself or work alongside someone who does, understanding these characteristics can help you harness their strengths while staying mindful of potential downsides. Let us take a closer look at the qualities that fuel achievement and shape some of today’s most motivated individuals!

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How Can I Increase My Concentration and Focus?

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How Can I Increase My Concentration and Focus?

In today’s fast-paced world, maintaining concentration and focus can feel like an uphill battle. Between constant notifications, multitasking, and mental fatigue, it is easy to get distracted and struggle to stay on task. Whether you are trying to excel at work, study more efficiently, or simply manage daily responsibilities, understanding how attention works and learning strategies to strengthen it can make a meaningful difference in your productivity and overall well-being.

Improving focus is not just about willpower, it involves creating the right environment, cultivating healthy habits, and training your brain to stay engaged. Small, intentional changes in your routine can have a significant impact, from minimizing distractions and organizing your workspace to practicing mindfulness and managing energy levels throughout the day. In this blog, we will explore practical, evidence-based ways to boost your concentration and sustain mental clarity so you can approach tasks with greater efficiency and confidence.

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Returning to Work After Loss

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Returning to Work After Loss

Returning to work after experiencing a loss can feel overwhelming as grief does not follow a set schedule and often does not pause when life demands productivity. The workplace, with its deadlines, meetings, and social expectations can amplify feelings of exhaustion, emotional vulnerability, and disconnection. Many people find themselves juggling the need to perform professionally while navigating waves of sadness, guilt, or anxiety which can make even familiar tasks feel daunting.

Yet, returning to work can also offer structure, purpose, and a sense of normalcy during a difficult time. With the right strategies and support, it is possible to honor your grief while gradually re-engaging with your professional responsibilities. In this post, we will explore practical ways to navigate this transition, manage emotional triggers, and seek support in the workplace so that returning to work becomes a step toward healing rather than an added source of stress.

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Career Counseling for Layoffs

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Career Counseling for Layoffs

Experiencing a layoff can trigger a profound emotional response- grief, anxiety, shame, and a loss of identity are all common reactions. As mental health professionals at Anchor Therapy, we understand that job loss is not just a financial disruption but a psychological upheaval that can deeply impact self-worth and emotional stability. The uncertainty of “what is next” can activate fear responses, especially when work has been tied closely to a sense of purpose or routine.

Career counseling through a mental health lens offers more than just job search strategies- it provides a compassionate space to process the emotional toll of a layoff. By integrating therapeutic techniques with practical career guidance, you can begin to heal, redefine your professional identity, and take steps forward that align with both your values and emotional well-being.

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What Is Invisible Emotional Labor?

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What Is Invisible Emotional Labor?

Invisible emotional labor refers to the often unrecognized and unacknowledged work of managing emotions- both your own and those of others. It is the mental and emotional effort that goes into maintaining harmony in relationships, managing workplace dynamics, or taking care of others' emotional needs without receiving formal recognition or compensation. This form of labor can show up in many areas of life, from supporting a friend through a tough time, to managing the mood of a team at work, to performing the emotional heavy lifting in a household. While it is typically invisible to others, it can weigh heavily on the person doing the work, leading to burnout and emotional exhaustion.

What makes invisible emotional labor particularly challenging is that it is often assumed to be a “natural” role or responsibility, especially for women, parents, or caregivers. Society tends to overlook the emotional effort it takes to keep relationships and environments functional, and often, the people doing this work do not even realize how much they are giving until they feel drained or overwhelmed. In this blog, we will unpack what invisible emotional labor looks like, why it is important to recognize it, and how to navigate it without letting it take a toll on your well-being.

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