boundaries, self-esteem, Narcissistic Abuse, family counseling, Childhood trauma
Courtney Glashow
Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When ...

Maybe you're the one who gets blamed no matter what actually happened, at home, at work, or even with friends. Something goes wrong, and somehow it lands on you. If that sounds familiar, there's a word for what's happening: scapegoat. A scapegoat is a person who's unfairly blamed for problems they didn't cause. Scapegoating shows up most in families, where it's often called being the family scapegoat.

Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When Someone Is Using You as a Scapegoat
toxic relationships, Narcissistic Abuse, breakup therapy, Trust Issues, trauma counseling
Courtney Glashow
How to Recover From Love Bombing

Love bombing can leave you doubting everything you felt. Here's how to recover from love bombing, why it hits so hard, and the steps that help you heal and trust yourself again.

How to Recover From Love Bombing
Couples counseling, toxic relationships, Trust Issues, Hoboken NJ therapist, Narcissistic Abuse
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

You're walking on eggshells in your own home. Conversations that should be simple turn into something you have to brace yourself for, and the moment you push back on anything, the script flips and somehow you're the bad one. You've started Googling words like "narcissist" and "manipulation" at 11pm because you don't know what to call what's happening, but you know something is wrong. You searched for how to deal with a narcissist, and you landed here. This post walks through what actually counts as narcissistic behavior versus everyday self-centeredness, what to watch for in your own relationship, and 8 specific strategies our therapists at Anchor Therapy use with clients who can't, or aren't ready to, leave the relationship.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
Couples counseling, marriage counseling, relationship counseling, Intimacy therapy, lgbtqia support
Courtney Glashow
Couples Therapy Show: Where Are They Now? Dr. ...

Dr. Orna Guralnik, is a New York City-based Clinical Psychologist and Psychoanalyst, who rose to fame due to her hit Showtime television show, Couples Therapy. Couples Therapy is a documentary series that follows couples as they try to navigate their troubles and concerns. This unscripted series features real couples from the greater New York City area.

As viewers work through the show’s three seasons, they are taught to view the therapeutic process through a lens of compassion and empathy instead of hastiness. Episode by episode, viewers are immersed into the real world of couples counseling, viewing the progress and occasional backsliding of couples.

Couples Therapy Show: Where Are They Now? Dr. Orna Guralnik's Couples on Showtime
relationship counseling, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

CBT Page

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10 Cognitive Distortions That Are Common Thinking Traps

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10 Cognitive Distortions That Are Common Thinking Traps

Have you ever made one small mistake and immediately thought, “I’m terrible at this”? Or maybe you’ve had a friend cancel plans and found yourself wondering if they’re upset with you, even though they never said anything was wrong. These kinds of thoughts can feel automatic and convincing, but they don’t always tell the full story.

Cognitive distortions are patterns of thinking that can cause us to interpret situations in inaccurate or unhelpful ways. They’re common, and most of us fall into them from time to time, especially when we’re stressed, anxious, overwhelmed, or dealing with difficult emotions. In this blog, we’ll look at 10 common cognitive distortions, what they can look like in everyday life, and how learning to recognize these thinking traps can help you respond to your thoughts with more perspective.

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What Is It Like Being the Golden Child? Golden Child Syndrome Signs

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What Is It Like Being the Golden Child? Golden Child Syndrome Signs

If you're the golden child in your family, chances are you already know the feeling, even if you've never had a name for it. Golden child syndrome is the family pattern where one child gets held up as the favorite, always praised, always expected to succeed, and treated as the example everyone else in the family should follow.

Parents, teachers, and even extended family members may shower you with admiration, reinforcing a sense of confidence and achievement. Knowing that your accomplishments are met with pride and celebration can be very validating and keep you in a loop of wanting to seek constant approval from other people. You may find that your mistakes are overlooked or easily forgiven.

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Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When Someone Is Using You as a Scapegoat

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Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When Someone Is Using You as a Scapegoat

Maybe you're the one who gets blamed no matter what actually happened, at home, at work, or even with friends. Something goes wrong, and somehow it lands on you. If that sounds familiar, there's a word for what's happening: scapegoat. A scapegoat is a person who's unfairly blamed for problems they didn't cause. Scapegoating shows up most in families, where it's often called being the family scapegoat.

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How Scrupulosity OCD Turns Your Conscience Into a Compulsion

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How Scrupulosity OCD Turns Your Conscience Into a Compulsion

Someone double-checks a text message for the fifth time, not because they're unsure what it says, but because they're terrified it might have sounded rude. Someone else prays the same sentence over and over, convinced that if they don't get the wording exactly right, it doesn't count. They're not being extra careful or having an off week. What they're both describing is something a lot of people quietly live with for years before anyone puts a name to it.

Scrupulosity OCD is a subtype of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder built around religious or moral obsessions, the fear that you've sinned, offended a higher power, or secretly become a bad person. It's often mistaken for being unusually devout or unusually ethical, which is part of why it goes undiagnosed for so long. In this post, we'll look at what scrupulosity OCD actually involves, how thought-action fusion fuels it, why trying harder to be good can make it worse, and what treatment actually looks like.

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Noah Kahan Documentary Out of Body: His OCD Diagnosis and Body Dysmorphia

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Noah Kahan Documentary Out of Body: His OCD Diagnosis and Body Dysmorphia

Out of Body is a Netflix documentary that follows Noah Kahan for about a year, and it's the first time he's talked publicly about his OCD diagnosis and years of body dysmorphia. Fans expected tour footage and Vermont scenery. What they got was a look at two things he'd kept almost entirely private. If you've been searching for what he actually said, this post walks through it.

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Do I Have Anxiety? Take the Quiz and Learn 5 Instant Calming Tips

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Do I Have Anxiety? Take the Quiz and Learn 5 Instant Calming Tips

Not sure if it's anxiety? Take our anxiety quiz and get 5 calming tips you can use right away.

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How to Overcome Claustrophobia: A Therapist's Guide

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How to Overcome Claustrophobia: A Therapist's Guide

Elevators, MRIs, and crowded rooms don't have to run your life. Here's how to overcome claustrophobia, step by step, and why the fear responds so well to treatment.

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10 Type A Personality Traits That Drive Success

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10 Type A Personality Traits That Drive Success

Type A personalities are driven, competitive, and time-urgent. Here are the 10 Type A personality traits that fuel success, the real link to stress, and how to keep your edge without burning out.

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How to Calm Your Fear of Confrontation and Difficult Conversations

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How to Calm Your Fear of Confrontation and Difficult Conversations

You have been rehearsing the same conversation in your head for three days. Maybe it is asking your boss for a raise, telling a friend they hurt you, or finally bringing up something with your partner that you have been avoiding for weeks. Your stomach knots, your heart picks up speed, and a quiet voice insists that it would just be easier to say nothing at all. If that sounds familiar, you are dealing with something very common and very treatable.

Communication anxiety is the intense fear or dread you feel before, during, or after important conversations, especially serious ones that carry the risk of conflict or disappointment. For many people, this shows up most strongly as a fear of difficult conversations, the kind where the stakes feel high and the outcome feels uncertain. In this blog, you will learn what communication anxiety is, why your brain treats hard talks like a threat, what keeps the fear going, and how therapy can help you speak up without spiraling.

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Are Empaths Real?

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Are Empaths Real?

Have you ever walked into a room and immediately felt the emotional temperature shift? Maybe you picked up on a friend's sadness before they said a single word, or you left a party feeling completely drained by emotions that weren't even yours. If that sounds familiar, you've probably wondered whether you're an empath, and whether empaths are even real.

An empath is a person with an extraordinary sensitivity to the emotions, energy, and moods of the people around them, experiencing those feelings as if they were their own. It's a term that gets used a lot on social media and in wellness communities, but the question of whether empaths are real is worth answering honestly. The science turns out to be more interesting than either the skeptics or the true believers tend to admit.

In this blog, we'll look at what the research says, how psychology understands high emotional sensitivity, and what it all means for your mental health and relationships.

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What Happens in Your Brain During A Panic Attack

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What Happens in Your Brain During A Panic Attack

A panic attack can feel like a sudden, overwhelming storm- your heart races, your chest tightens, and a wave of fear seems to come out of nowhere. But beneath these intense physical sensations is a complex chain reaction happening inside your brain. In moments of perceived danger, your brain’s alarm system springs into action, even if there is no real threat present. This misfiring of survival instincts can make a harmless situation feel life-threatening, leaving you confused and shaken.

At the center of it all is the brain’s fear circuitry which is designed to protect you but can sometimes overreact. Stress hormones surge, your breathing quickens, and your body shifts into fight-or-flight mode within seconds. Understanding what is happening in your brain during a panic attack does not just make the experience less mysterious, it can also help you regain a sense of control. When you realize your brain is trying (and failing) to protect you, it becomes easier to respond with awareness rather than fear.

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Spot the Signs of Gaming Addiction

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Spot the Signs of Gaming Addiction

Gaming has evolved from a casual pastime into a full-fledged cultural phenomenon, offering immersive worlds, social connections, and endless challenges. While most players enjoy gaming responsibly, for some, what starts as a hobby can spiral into a compulsive habit. Recognizing the warning signs early is crucial, not only for the individual but also for their loved ones, because gaming addiction can subtly impact mental health, relationships, and daily responsibilities without being immediately obvious.

Understanding the behavioral patterns behind excessive gaming is the first step toward prevention and intervention. From neglecting work or school commitments to feeling irritable when not playing, these signs can manifest in ways that blend seamlessly into everyday life. By learning to spot these patterns, families, friends, and even gamers themselves can take proactive steps to regain balance, ensuring that gaming remains a fun and healthy part of life rather than a disruptive force.

Why Motivation Fails and What Actually Works Instead

Why Motivation Fails and What Actually Works Instead

Motivation often feels like the key to achieving goals, yet it frequently falls short when it is needed most. People start projects with enthusiasm only to find their drive fading after a few days or weeks. This pattern is not a sign of failure. Instead, it is a natural consequence of relying on willpower alone, without systems or habits to support progress. Understanding why motivation falters can reveal better ways to create lasting momentum.

Rather than waiting for inspiration to strike, success comes from building consistent routines, breaking goals into manageable steps, and creating structures that encourage follow-through. Small, deliberate actions, combined with clear priorities and accountability, tend to produce far more reliable results than bursts of enthusiasm. By shifting focus from fleeting motivation to practical strategies, meaningful progress becomes achievable even when initial excitement wanes.

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Everyday Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) Tools for Hoboken Residents

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Everyday Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) Tools for Hoboken Residents

Life in Hoboken can be fast-paced, vibrant, and full of little stressors, from the morning rush along Washington Street to navigating crowded weekend spots by the waterfront. Amid the city’s energy, it is easy to get caught up in negative thoughts, anxiety, or frustration over things beyond your control. That is where Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) comes in. REBT offers practical tools to help you identify irrational beliefs, challenge them, and replace them with healthier, more rational ways of thinking which turns everyday stress into opportunities for calm and clarity.

For Hoboken residents, applying REBT does not always mean setting aside hours for therapy sessions. It is about using simple, everyday strategies to respond more effectively to life’s challenges whether that is dealing with traffic on Sinatra Drive, handling work stress, or navigating social pressures in a tightly knit community. By integrating REBT into your daily routine, you can develop a mindset that’s both resilient and rational, helping you enjoy Hoboken’s unique charm without letting small frustrations take over!

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for OCD: How It Works and Why It Helps

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for OCD: How It Works and Why It Helps

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is widely recognized as one of the most effective treatments for Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). OCD is characterized by persistent, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors or mental rituals (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety. These patterns can interfere with daily life, relationships, and overall well-being. CBT for OCD is a structured, evidence-based approach that helps individuals understand the connection between their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and gradually learn to respond to obsessions in healthier ways. Unlike medications alone, CBT addresses the root patterns that maintain OCD symptoms.

One of the key components of CBT for OCD is Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), which involves facing feared situations or intrusive thoughts without engaging in compulsive behaviors. Through this process, individuals learn to tolerate uncertainty and anxiety, ultimately reducing the power of obsessions over time. CBT also incorporates cognitive restructuring, helping clients challenge unhelpful beliefs and develop more balanced thinking patterns. Delivered by trained therapists at Anchor Therapy, CBT for OCD empowers individuals to regain control, improve daily functioning, and build long-lasting coping skills that support a more balanced, fulfilling life.

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What Are The Four Types of Codependency?

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What Are The Four Types of Codependency?

Codependency is a behavioral and emotional condition where individuals prioritize others’ needs over their own, often leading to unhealthy relationships. Research shows that the four main types of codependency include the caretaker, enabler, controller, and adjuster. The caretaker constantly sacrifices their own well-being to care for others, often feeling needed as a way to gain self-worth. The enabler supports or covers for another person’s harmful behavior, such as substance abuse, to avoid conflict or guilt, indirectly allowing the destructive patterns to continue.

The controller type tries to manage or dictate the behaviors of others to maintain a sense of stability, often stemming from fear of chaos or loss. The adjuster, on the other hand, adapts their behavior to please others, suppressing their own emotions and desires to avoid rejection or disapproval. Recognizing these types is crucial for self-awareness and personal growth, as each can impact relationships differently and may require targeted strategies for healthier interactions and boundaries.

Holiday Stress Archetypes: Are You the Over-Planner, Peacekeeper, or Procrasinator?

Holiday Stress Archetypes: Are You the Over-Planner, Peacekeeper, or Procrasinator?

The holidays may be a time filled with nostalgia and celebration, but beneath the glitter lies a familiar tension many of us try to hide. From last-minute shopping to emotional family dynamics, stress shows up in wildly different ways and most of us fall into predictable patterns without even realizing it. That is where the idea of holiday stress archetypes comes in. These personality-driven patterns shape how we plan, react, and cope during the busiest season of the year, and understanding them can help you navigate the holidays with far more clarity and calm.

This year, instead of pushing through on autopilot, take a closer look at your holiday habits. Are you the over-planner who finds comfort in perfectly color-coded lists? The peacekeeper who smooths over every conflict and ends up emotionally drained? Or the procrastinator who waits until deadline pressure kicks motivation into high gear? Identifying your archetype is not about labeling yourself. Instead, it is about uncovering what you need to stay balanced, joyful, and grounded during a season that often demands more than it gives. Let us explore how recognizing your patterns can transform the way you experience the holidays!

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