boundaries, self-esteem, Narcissistic Abuse, family counseling, Childhood trauma
Courtney Glashow
Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When ...

Maybe you're the one who gets blamed no matter what actually happened, at home, at work, or even with friends. Something goes wrong, and somehow it lands on you. If that sounds familiar, there's a word for what's happening: scapegoat. A scapegoat is a person who's unfairly blamed for problems they didn't cause. Scapegoating shows up most in families, where it's often called being the family scapegoat.

Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When Someone Is Using You as a Scapegoat
toxic relationships, Narcissistic Abuse, breakup therapy, Trust Issues, trauma counseling
Courtney Glashow
How to Recover From Love Bombing

Love bombing can leave you doubting everything you felt. Here's how to recover from love bombing, why it hits so hard, and the steps that help you heal and trust yourself again.

How to Recover From Love Bombing
Couples counseling, toxic relationships, Trust Issues, Hoboken NJ therapist, Narcissistic Abuse
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

You're walking on eggshells in your own home. Conversations that should be simple turn into something you have to brace yourself for, and the moment you push back on anything, the script flips and somehow you're the bad one. You've started Googling words like "narcissist" and "manipulation" at 11pm because you don't know what to call what's happening, but you know something is wrong. You searched for how to deal with a narcissist, and you landed here. This post walks through what actually counts as narcissistic behavior versus everyday self-centeredness, what to watch for in your own relationship, and 8 specific strategies our therapists at Anchor Therapy use with clients who can't, or aren't ready to, leave the relationship.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
Couples counseling, marriage counseling, relationship counseling, Intimacy therapy, lgbtqia support
Courtney Glashow
Couples Therapy Show: Where Are They Now? Dr. ...

Dr. Orna Guralnik, is a New York City-based Clinical Psychologist and Psychoanalyst, who rose to fame due to her hit Showtime television show, Couples Therapy. Couples Therapy is a documentary series that follows couples as they try to navigate their troubles and concerns. This unscripted series features real couples from the greater New York City area.

As viewers work through the show’s three seasons, they are taught to view the therapeutic process through a lens of compassion and empathy instead of hastiness. Episode by episode, viewers are immersed into the real world of couples counseling, viewing the progress and occasional backsliding of couples.

Couples Therapy Show: Where Are They Now? Dr. Orna Guralnik's Couples on Showtime
relationship counseling, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

Relationship Counseling Page

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Enmeshed Family: What It's Like to Date Someone Who Grew Up in One

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Enmeshed Family: What It's Like to Date Someone Who Grew Up in One

Your partner's mom calls every single day, sometimes twice. Every plan you make together gets run past her first, even small ones, even ones that have nothing to do with her. You've started to notice you're not quite sure where your partner's opinion ends and their mother's begins. You love this person, but you also can't shake the feeling that you're dating two people instead of one.

An enmeshed family is one where the boundaries between family members are blurred or missing entirely, so individual identity, decisions, and emotions get absorbed into the family as a whole instead of staying separate. When you date someone from a family like this, you're not just dating them. You're dating a whole system that doesn't always leave room for you. This post covers what enmeshment actually is, how to spot it early, and what it takes to build a relationship that can hold both your partner and their family without losing you in the process.

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Covert Narcissist: The Quiet Signs Most People Miss

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Covert Narcissist: The Quiet Signs Most People Miss

You keep replaying the conversation in your head. On paper, nothing that was said sounds that bad, no yelling, no insults, no dramatic scene. So why do you feel small? Why do you feel like you somehow ended up apologizing for something you didn't even do?

Covert narcissism is a pattern of self-focus, fragile self-esteem, and quiet control that hides behind humility, victimhood, or shyness instead of obvious, outward arrogance. You won't see the grandiosity people usually associate with narcissism. Instead, you'll see someone who seems sensitive, self-deprecating, even a little insecure, while somehow still managing to make every conversation circle back to them. 

If you've walked away from someone feeling confused, guilty, or smaller than you were an hour ago, and you can't quite explain why, keep reading. This post covers what covert narcissism actually is, how it's different from the loud, obvious version most people picture, and what it looks like when you're the one living with it.

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What Is It Like Being the Golden Child? Golden Child Syndrome Signs

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What Is It Like Being the Golden Child? Golden Child Syndrome Signs

If you're the golden child in your family, chances are you already know the feeling, even if you've never had a name for it. Golden child syndrome is the family pattern where one child gets held up as the favorite, always praised, always expected to succeed, and treated as the example everyone else in the family should follow.

Parents, teachers, and even extended family members may shower you with admiration, reinforcing a sense of confidence and achievement. Knowing that your accomplishments are met with pride and celebration can be very validating and keep you in a loop of wanting to seek constant approval from other people. You may find that your mistakes are overlooked or easily forgiven.

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Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When Someone Is Using You as a Scapegoat

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Family Scapegoat Signs and What to Do When Someone Is Using You as a Scapegoat

Maybe you're the one who gets blamed no matter what actually happened, at home, at work, or even with friends. Something goes wrong, and somehow it lands on you. If that sounds familiar, there's a word for what's happening: scapegoat. A scapegoat is a person who's unfairly blamed for problems they didn't cause. Scapegoating shows up most in families, where it's often called being the family scapegoat.

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Flying Monkeys Meaning: Why People Get Used By A Narcissist

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Flying Monkeys Meaning: Why People Get Used By A Narcissist

Flying monkeys meaning explained by our Hoboken, NJ therapists: the people a narcissist recruits to pressure you, and how to protect your peace.

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One-Sided Friendships: Why You're Always the One Reaching Out

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One-Sided Friendships: Why You're Always the One Reaching Out

A one-sided friendship is one where one person does most of the work. You reach out first. You remember the small stuff. You show up when things get hard. Here's how to spot the pattern and what to do once you see it.

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Birth Order Theory: What Your Place in the Family Actually Shapes

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Birth Order Theory: What Your Place in the Family Actually Shapes

Is the oldest really bossy and the baby really spoiled? Here's what birth order theory actually says about your personality, your relationships, and who you tend to date, plus what the newest research says about whether any of it holds up.

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How to Recover From Love Bombing

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How to Recover From Love Bombing

Love bombing can leave you doubting everything you felt. Here's how to recover from love bombing, why it hits so hard, and the steps that help you heal and trust yourself again.

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Co-Parenting With a Narcissist and How to Protect Your Kids and Your Peace

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Co-Parenting With a Narcissist and How to Protect Your Kids and Your Peace

Co-parenting with a narcissist can feel impossible. Here's how parallel parenting and gray-rock communication protect your kids and your own peace.

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Gray Rock Method: How to Handle a Narcissist You Can't Avoid

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Gray Rock Method: How to Handle a Narcissist You Can't Avoid

If you are stuck dealing with a narcissist you cannot simply walk away from, you already know how draining every interaction can be. Maybe it is a co-parent, a boss, a coworker, or a family member, and going no contact is not an option right now. You may have searched for the gray rock method because you heard it can help you protect your peace when you have to keep showing up. The gray rock method is a way of becoming so calm, plain, and unreactive that a manipulative person loses interest in trying to get a rise out of you.

In this post, we’ll explain what the gray rock method is, why it works on people who feed off your reactions, and how to use it step by step. We’ll also be honest about its limits, including when it is not safe to use and what to do instead. At Anchor Therapy, we help people navigate narcissistic and toxic relationships every day, and you don’t have to figure this out alone.

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The Silent Treatment: Why It Hurts So Much and How to Respond

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The Silent Treatment: Why It Hurts So Much and How to Respond

If someone you love has gone quiet on you, shutting down and refusing to speak, you already know how confusing and painful it feels. Maybe you’ve been searching for the psychology of the silent treatment because you want to understand what’s really happening and why it cuts so deep. You’re not alone, and your reaction isn’t an overreaction. The silent treatment is the deliberate refusal to talk to or acknowledge another person as a way to express anger, gain control, or punish them.

In this post, we’ll walk through why people use the silent treatment, what it does to your brain and body, and when this pattern crosses the line into emotional abuse. We’ll also look at how to tell the silent treatment apart from a healthy need for space, and what you can do to respond. At Anchor Therapy, we help people untangle these dynamics every day, and we are with you every step of the way.

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10 Type A Personality Traits That Drive Success

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10 Type A Personality Traits That Drive Success

Type A personalities are driven, competitive, and time-urgent. Here are the 10 Type A personality traits that fuel success, the real link to stress, and how to keep your edge without burning out.

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Tell Me Lies and Toxic Relationships: What the Show Gets Right

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Tell Me Lies and Toxic Relationships: What the Show Gets Right

If you've watched Tell Me Lies and found yourself unable to look away, even while knowing that everything about Stephen and Lucy's relationship was wrong, you're not alone. There's something deeply uncomfortable about how recognizable it all feels. 

The way charm can make you second-guess your own instincts. The way someone can make you feel chosen and disposable in the same breath. The way you can see the damage happening and still not be able to walk away.

Tell Me Lies is a Hulu drama series that follows college student Lucy Albright as she becomes entangled with Stephen DeMarco, a manipulative and emotionally destructive partner whose behavior spirals across three seasons into one of the most clinically accurate portrayals of a toxic relationship on television. This blog breaks down what the show gets right about manipulation, why Stephen and Lucy's dynamic is so hard to leave, and what it looks like to actually heal from a relationship like theirs.

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Financial Infidelity: What It Is and How to Rebuild Trust

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Financial Infidelity: What It Is and How to Rebuild Trust

It starts as a conversation about a credit card statement and ends with both of you in separate rooms, not speaking. Or one of you makes a purchase the other didn't know about, and suddenly you're not just talking about money anymore. You're talking about trust, control, and whether you're actually on the same team. Sound familiar?

Financial stress in relationships is the tension, conflict, and emotional distance that arises when partners have different money habits, values, or communication styles around finances. It is one of the most common and least talked-about sources of relationship strain, and it affects couples at every income level. This blog breaks down why money fights happen, what's really going on underneath them, and what you and your partner can do to get on the same page.

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Growing Up With Conditional Love in a Dysfunctional Family System

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Growing Up With Conditional Love in a Dysfunctional Family System

If love in your home growing up always felt like something you had to earn, you already know how exhausting that is to carry. Maybe you learned early that affection came with conditions: be good enough, stay quiet enough, achieve enough, and you'd be okay. Step out of line, and the warmth disappeared. Conditional love is when a parent's affection, approval, or emotional availability depends on a child meeting certain expectations rather than being offered freely and consistently. That kind of environment shapes you in ways that don't just stay in childhood.

Growing up with conditional love in a dysfunctional family system can affect how you see yourself, how you relate to others, and how you move through the world as an adult, often without realizing where those patterns came from. This blog will walk you through what conditional love actually looks like, how it affects adult relationships and self-worth, and what healing can look like with the right support.

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