Scapegoating in Families, Scapegoat, nj therapist, nyc counselor, nyc therapist
Courtney Glashow
What To Do When Someone Is Using You As A ...

While everyone suffers and goes through uncomfortable situations from time-to-time, that does not mean that you should be left to suffer. In a scapegoating situation, you as the scapegoat are the one who assumes responsibility on behalf of someone else. This is not a voluntary position that you offer, instead it is pushed upon you. 

Scapegoating can occur in many different environments. Most commonly, people discuss scapegoating dynamics within families. For more information, read our blog “Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families.” In families, a scapegoat can be unfairly blamed for conflicts within the family.

With that being said, scapegoating can occur in other relationships as well. At work, an employee or group of workers may be blamed for company-wide or organizational problems. At school, a student may be targeted for classroom concerns. Within communities, certain people may be blamed for widespread social problems. Regardless of the setting, the act of scapegoating is always used to intentionally shift blame and avoid addressing the reality of a situation and the actual issues at-hand.

What To Do When Someone Is Using You As A Scapegoat
Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
love bombing, nyc therapist, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you. 

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing
toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right

example of CBT therapy for anxiety

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for OCD: How It Works and Why It Helps

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for OCD: How It Works and Why It Helps

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is widely recognized as one of the most effective treatments for Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). OCD is characterized by persistent, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors or mental rituals (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety. These patterns can interfere with daily life, relationships, and overall well-being. CBT for OCD is a structured, evidence-based approach that helps individuals understand the connection between their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and gradually learn to respond to obsessions in healthier ways. Unlike medications alone, CBT addresses the root patterns that maintain OCD symptoms.

One of the key components of CBT for OCD is Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), which involves facing feared situations or intrusive thoughts without engaging in compulsive behaviors. Through this process, individuals learn to tolerate uncertainty and anxiety, ultimately reducing the power of obsessions over time. CBT also incorporates cognitive restructuring, helping clients challenge unhelpful beliefs and develop more balanced thinking patterns. Delivered by trained therapists at Anchor Therapy, CBT for OCD empowers individuals to regain control, improve daily functioning, and build long-lasting coping skills that support a more balanced, fulfilling life.

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The Difference Between Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) vs Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS)

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The Difference Between Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) vs Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS)

Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) and Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS) are often mentioned interchangeably, but understanding the distinction is crucial, especially for mental health awareness. While PMS is relatively common and typically involves mild emotional and physical symptoms like irritability, bloating, and fatigue, PMDD is a far more severe condition that can significantly disrupt daily life. 

Women with PMDD may experience intense mood swings, debilitating anxiety, deep sadness, and even thoughts of hopelessness, often in the week leading up to menstruation. Recognizing these differences is key to seeking appropriate support and treatment rather than dismissing the symptoms as “just part of being a woman.”

From a mental health perspective, PMDD is not simply a hormonal inconvenience, it is a serious mood disorder with major impacts. The emotional and cognitive symptoms can mimic or exacerbate conditions like depression and anxiety, making timely diagnosis and intervention essential. Raising awareness about PMDD helps reduce stigma and empowers those affected to access mental health care, explore coping strategies, and find relief. Understanding the difference between PMS and PMDD is the first step toward validating the lived experiences of those who face this challenging condition each month.

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Living with Emotional Numbness After Trauma

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Living with Emotional Numbness After Trauma

For many survivors of trauma, the world does not just simply feel different, it actually feels muted. Emotions that once came easily may now seem distant or entirely absent, leaving a sense of disconnection from oneself and others. This emotional numbness is a common but often misunderstood symptom of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), a protective response of the brain designed to shield us from overwhelming pain. While it may feel like a relief in the short term, over time, the inability to feel joy, sadness, or even anger can create its own form of suffering, affecting relationships, daily life, and self-perception.

Living with emotional numbness can be confusing and isolating. You might find yourself watching life pass by from behind a fog, unsure if what you are experiencing is “normal” or permanent. Yet, it is important to know that emotional numbness is not a personal failing. Instead, it is a signal from your nervous system that it needs safety, time, and gentle care. Understanding why this numbness occurs and learning strategies to reconnect with your emotions are critical steps toward reclaiming a sense of vitality and engagement in your life.

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Which Type of Insomnia Do You Have?

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Which Type of Insomnia Do You Have?

Struggling to sleep is not just frustrating- it can take a toll on your mental, emotional, and physical well-being. But what many people do not realize is that insomnia is not a one-size-fits-all problem. There are different types, each with its own causes, patterns, and psychological impact. Some people cannot fall asleep no matter how exhausted they are, while others wake up at 2 or 3 a.m. and cannot get back to sleep. Understanding the type of insomnia you are experiencing is the first step toward getting the right kind of support.

At Anchor Therapy, our sleep anxiety counselors often see clients who have been battling insomnia for months or even years without knowing there is more than one way it can present. Knowing whether your insomnia is acute, chronic, sleep-onset, or sleep-maintenance related can help guide treatment options, whether that is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for insomnia (CBT-I), trauma-focused care, or stress management techniques. In this blog, we will break down the common types of insomnia and explain why identifying your specific sleep pattern is so important for finding relief that lasts.

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How Can I Control My Anxiety While Pregnant?

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How Can I Control My Anxiety While Pregnant?

Pregnancy can be an exciting yet overwhelming time and, for many, anxiety can become an unexpected challenge. The physical, emotional, and hormonal changes that come with pregnancy may trigger feelings of worry, stress, and fear about the future. Managing anxiety during this period is crucial not only for your well-being but also for the health of your baby. It is important to acknowledge your feelings and seek ways to navigate this rollercoaster of emotions in a calm and healthy manner!


There are several strategies that can help you maintain peace of mind during pregnancy, from deep breathing exercises and mindfulness practices to physical activities that reduce tension. Connecting with a supportive network of friends, family, or women’s health professionals can also provide comfort and reassurance. In this blog, we will explore some of the most effective ways to manage anxiety while pregnant, ensuring that you can enjoy this beautiful journey with more calm and confidence.

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Why Do I Get Anxiety In The Summer?

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Why Do I Get Anxiety In The Summer?

As many of us know, weather and the changing of seasons can certainly affect our mood. Dark skies and cold temperatures that plague the winter doom can trigger Seasonal Affective Disorder, also known as SAD, and depression. If you are struggling with this, check out our blog “What is Seasonal Affective Disorder and How Is It Treated?”. 

While many people, especially children and teens, look forward to the summer months, warm weather can negatively affect people too. Summer anxiety is a major issue that many people can deal with. By working with an anxiety therapist at Anchor Therapy, you can overcome your anxious thoughts and make the most out of your summer!

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