Couples counseling, toxic relationships, Trust Issues, Hoboken NJ therapist, Narcissistic Abuse
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

You're walking on eggshells in your own home. Conversations that should be simple turn into something you have to brace yourself for, and the moment you push back on anything, the script flips and somehow you're the bad one. You've started Googling words like "narcissist" and "manipulation" at 11pm because you don't know what to call what's happening, but you know something is wrong. You searched for how to deal with a narcissist, and you landed here. This post walks through what actually counts as narcissistic behavior versus everyday self-centeredness, what to watch for in your own relationship, and 8 specific strategies our therapists at Anchor Therapy use with clients who can't, or aren't ready to, leave the relationship.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
nj therapist, nyc therapist, boundaries
Courtney Glashow
What To Do When Someone Is Using You As A ...

While everyone suffers and goes through uncomfortable situations from time-to-time, that does not mean that you should be left to suffer. In a scapegoating situation, you as the scapegoat are the one who assumes responsibility on behalf of someone else. This is not a voluntary position that you offer, instead it is pushed upon you. 

Scapegoating can occur in many different environments. Most commonly, people discuss scapegoating dynamics within families. For more information, read our blog “Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families.” In families, a scapegoat can be unfairly blamed for conflicts within the family.

With that being said, scapegoating can occur in other relationships as well. At work, an employee or group of workers may be blamed for company-wide or organizational problems. At school, a student may be targeted for classroom concerns. Within communities, certain people may be blamed for widespread social problems. Regardless of the setting, the act of scapegoating is always used to intentionally shift blame and avoid addressing the reality of a situation and the actual issues at-hand.

What To Do When Someone Is Using You As A Scapegoat
family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist
Courtney Glashow
Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team. 

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk. 

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families
nyc therapist, relationship counseling, loneliness
Courtney Glashow
Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you. 

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing
relationship counseling, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

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Dating Someone with OCD

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Dating Someone with OCD

Dating someone with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) can be deeply meaningful, but it also comes with nuances that are not always visible from the outside. OCD is not just about being neat or liking things a certain way. It often involves intrusive thoughts, intense anxiety, and repetitive behaviors performed to find relief. As a partner, you may find yourself wanting to help, to reassure, or to “fix” what your loved one is going through. But understanding where support ends and unintentional reinforcement begins is part of the learning curve in building a healthy relationship.

At its core, dating someone with OCD is about patience, communication, and a willingness to understand a world that can feel overwhelming and unpredictable. It means recognizing that your partner’s fears may not always make logical sense but they are very real to them. It also means learning how to show up in ways that are compassionate without feeding the cycle of OCD. With the right balance, relationships involving OCD can grow stronger, rooted in empathy, trust, and a shared commitment to navigating challenges together.

Exploring the Neuroscience of Happiness

Exploring the Neuroscience of Happiness

Happiness has long been considered an elusive emotion. It is something we chase but can rarely define. With that being said, modern neuroscience is beginning to unravel the brain’s complex role in shaping our sense of well-being! From the release of neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin to the intricate interplay of neural circuits in brain regions, such as the prefrontal cortex and amygdala, researchers are uncovering how our brains generate and sustain feelings of joy, contentment, and fulfillment. Understanding the mechanisms that are at play not only deepens our appreciation for human experience, but also opens the door to practical strategies for enhancing happiness in daily life.

Beyond biology, the neuroscience of happiness reveals that our minds are able to change. Studies in neuroplasticity show that even small changes in thought patterns, habits, and social connections can rewire the brain in ways that promote lasting positive emotions. By exploring how our brains respond to pleasure, reward, and meaning, we gain insight into the delicate balance between nature and nurture in pursuing happiness. Whether you are curious about the science behind a fleeting smile or seeking evidence-based ways to boost your own happiness levels, your brain offers fascinating clues to building a happier life.

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What Is Digital Overstimulation and How Is It Affecting You?

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What Is Digital Overstimulation and How Is It Affecting You?

In today’s hyper-connected world, our brains are constantly bombarded with information, from social media notifications and endless emails to news alerts and streaming content. This constant influx of digital stimuli can overwhelm our mental processing, leaving us feeling drained, unfocused, and even anxious. Known as digital overstimulation, this phenomenon occurs when the sheer volume of information we consume exceeds our brain’s ability to manage it effectively. While technology offers a lot of convenience and connectivity, it also comes with the hidden cost of mental fatigue and reduced cognitive performance.

The effects of digital overstimulation extend beyond mere distraction. Studies have shown that excessive screen time and constant exposure to digital stimuli can impair memory, disrupt sleep patterns, and increase stress levels. It can even alter how we process emotions and interact with others in real life. Recognizing the signs of digital overstimulation; such as restlessness, irritability, or difficulty concentrating; is the first step toward regaining control over your attention and mental well-being. In this blog, we will explore what digital overstimulation is, how it impacts your life, and practical strategies so you can reclaim your focus and sense of balance!

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for OCD: How It Works and Why It Helps

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for OCD: How It Works and Why It Helps

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is widely recognized as one of the most effective treatments for Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). OCD is characterized by persistent, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors or mental rituals (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety. These patterns can interfere with daily life, relationships, and overall well-being. CBT for OCD is a structured, evidence-based approach that helps individuals understand the connection between their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and gradually learn to respond to obsessions in healthier ways. Unlike medications alone, CBT addresses the root patterns that maintain OCD symptoms.

One of the key components of CBT for OCD is Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), which involves facing feared situations or intrusive thoughts without engaging in compulsive behaviors. Through this process, individuals learn to tolerate uncertainty and anxiety, ultimately reducing the power of obsessions over time. CBT also incorporates cognitive restructuring, helping clients challenge unhelpful beliefs and develop more balanced thinking patterns. Delivered by trained therapists at Anchor Therapy, CBT for OCD empowers individuals to regain control, improve daily functioning, and build long-lasting coping skills that support a more balanced, fulfilling life.

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Are You Anxiously Attached or Just Feeling Insecure? A Guide to Telling the Difference

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Are You Anxiously Attached or Just Feeling Insecure? A Guide to Telling the Difference

It is easy to assume that feeling needy, worried, or “too much” in relationships means you have an anxious attachment style, but that is not always the case. Many people experience insecurity at times, especially in new relationships or moments of uncertainty. Insecurity is a feeling. Anxious attachment is a pattern. And while the two can look similar on the surface, understanding the difference can help you avoid mislabeling yourself and begin addressing the real issue underneath.

In this guide, we will break down how anxious attachment differs from everyday insecurity, why the distinction matters, and how each one shows up in your thoughts, emotions, and behavior. Whether you are trying to understand your own patterns or you are simply curious about relationship psychology, this breakdown will give you clarity, language, and practical insight you can use right away.

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What is Type A Personality?

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What is Type A Personality?

Ever wondered why some people always seem to be in a hurry, intensely focused on goals, and driven by competition? These traits are often associated with what psychologists call a Type A personality. First introduced in the 1950s by cardiologists Meyer Friedman and Ray Rosenman, the Type A behavior pattern has since become a popular way to describe individuals who thrive on achievement, urgency, and high standards- sometimes to the point of stress.

In this blog post, we will explore what it really means to have a Type A personality, how it can influence behavior, relationships, and even health, and why understanding this personality type can help you better manage your lifestyle! Whether you identify as Type A yourself or know someone who fits the mold, gaining insight into this personality type can offer valuable tools for balance, productivity, and well-being.

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Love Island and the Pressure of Perfection

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Love Island and the Pressure of Perfection

Love Island has become a cultural phenomenon, captivating people with its sun-filled villas and dramatic love stories. However, behind the glitz and glamour, there lies a darker reality: the intense pressure to embody perfection. Contestants are thrust into a world where their looks, personalities, and relationships are constantly scrutinized by both viewers and social media, creating an environment where self-worth is often measured by external validation. This constant spotlight can be mentally and emotionally taxing, especially for those who enter the villa seeking love and personal growth only to be met with the opposite experience of overwhelming expectations.

In this blog, we will explore how the quest for "perfection" on Love Island not only affects the mental health of contestants but also influences viewers. The narrative of flawless beauty, drama-filled romances, and constant competition perpetuates unrealistic ideals, raising important questions about body image, self-esteem, and the psychological toll of living up to society’s standards. Through this lens, we will dive deeper into the pressures of reality TV and examine how they contribute to an ongoing conversation about mental health in the entertainment industry.

10 Ways Nature Can Help Your Mental Health

10 Ways Nature Can Help Your Mental Health

In our fast-paced, digitally-driven world, it is easy to forget the profound impact nature can have on our well-being. Yet for centuries, people have turned to forests, oceans, and open skies for healing. From reducing stress and anxiety to boosting the immune system and fostering emotional balance, nature offers a restorative power that science is only beginning to fully understand.

The healing power of nature goes far beyond fresh air and scenic views. It involves a deep, often subconscious connection between the human body and the natural world. It is a relationship that promotes physical, mental, and spiritual health. In this blog, we will explore what this healing power truly means, why it works, and how you can tap into it to bring more calm, clarity, and vitality into your daily life.

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Is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) Right For Me?

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Is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) Right For Me?

If you have ever felt stuck in your thoughts, overwhelmed by emotions, or unsure how to move forward despite your best efforts, you are not alone and there is a therapy designed with that exact struggle in mind! Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) can help you develop psychological flexibility: the ability to stay present, even when things feel hard, and to take meaningful action guided by your values. Rather than trying to “fix” your thoughts or feelings, ACT teaches you how to relate to them differently, so they no longer control your life.


But how do you know if ACT is the right fit for you? Whether you are facing anxiety, depression, chronic stress, or simply feeling lost or disconnected, ACT offers a powerful framework for change that is backed by decades of research. This blog will help you understand what ACT really involves, who it works best for, and how it might support your personal growth and healing so you can make an informed, empowered decision about your mental health journey.

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Does Online Therapy Work for Trauma and PTSD?

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Does Online Therapy Work for Trauma and PTSD?

In recent years, online therapy has moved from a niche service to a mainstream mental health resource, especially in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic that  heightened both the demand for therapy and the need for accessible care! But for those dealing with the deep and complex wounds of trauma or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), a common question arises: Can healing really happen through a screen? This blog explores the effectiveness of online psychotherapy for trauma-related conditions, separating fact from myth and offering insights grounded into virtual therapy at Anchor Therapy.


Whether you are considering therapy for the first time or transitioning from in-person sessions, understanding how online formats support trauma recovery is essential. We will look at the science behind virtual trauma treatments, including Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR), Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and somatic approaches. After reading this blog, you will feel empowered with the information you need to make the right choice for your mental health journey.

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Exposure Therapy for Social Anxiety

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Exposure Therapy for Social Anxiety

Social anxiety can be an overwhelming and isolating experience, causing individuals to avoid situations that may trigger feelings of nervousness, embarrassment, or self-consciousness. Fortunately, one of the most effective treatments for social anxiety is exposure therapy. This therapeutic approach involves gradually and systematically exposing yourself to social situations in a controlled and supportive environment, helping you confront your fears without avoidance. Over time, this process helps to reduce anxiety, build confidence, and challenge the negative thought patterns that fuel social fears.


Exposure therapy works by allowing individuals to face their anxieties step by step, starting with less intimidating situations and slowly progressing to more challenging scenarios. This gradual exposure helps desensitize the individual to the feared stimuli, ultimately allowing them to experience social interactions without feeling overwhelmed. By practicing in real-world contexts, individuals can reframe their perceptions of social situations and learn that their fears are often exaggerated. Through consistent exposure and the guidance of a trained social anxiety therapist at Anchor Therapy, individuals with social anxiety can build the tools needed to navigate social environments with greater ease and comfort.

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Everything You Need to Know about CBT for Postpartum Depression

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Everything You Need to Know about CBT for Postpartum Depression

Postpartum depression, simply referred to as PPD, is a serious mental health condition that affects many new mothers, often leaving them feeling disconnected, overwhelmed, and uncertain. The arrival of a newborn is typically a time of joy, but the emotional and psychological toll of this major life transition can be significant. Luckily, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, or CBT, is an evidence-based treatment that has been proven to be a highly effective treatment for PPD. CBT for PPD offers new mothers tools to manage their mental health symptoms, challenge negative thought patterns, and construct healthier coping skills. Whether you are struggling with PPD yourself or know someone who is struggling, understanding how CBT works can make a big difference in the journey towards healing.


In this blog, we will dive into everything you need to know about CBT for PPD. You will learn how CBT targets the root causes of depression, its benefits, and how it can be integrated into your mental health treatment plan. If you are ready to learn more about how CBT can help ease the challenges of PPD, keep reading!

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How does music affect your mental health?

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How does music affect your mental health?

Music can have a major impact on mental health whether it is played as a source of comfort or used as a tool for emotional expression. From the calming effects of a soft melody or the energizing power of a favorite song, music can shape our mood and influence how we perceive and respond to the world around us. Think about your last heartbreak, you likely listened to some sad music to relish in your feelings. Or think about when you are trying to hype yourself up before a presentation at work, you likely listen to an upbeat song that makes you feel like you can take on the world! Music’s ability to evoke emotions and memories creates a therapeutic environment where people can feel understood, grounded, and connected.


Beyond just listening, music can also be a means of self-expression and processing emotions, helping you work through complex feelings that might otherwise be difficult to express. Creating music or singing along can serve as a form of emotional release. This can actually create a sense of accomplishment and help you better manage your emotional state. Music can be used to help you relax, heal, or motivate you. Music’s ability to resonate with the mind and body underscores its important role in maintaining mental health. For more information, check out our blog “5 Ways to Nurture Your Mind-Body Connection.”

Is Journaling Good For Your Mental Health?

Is Journaling Good For Your Mental Health?

Journaling is a simple yet effective tool for enhancing your mental health. When you physically write down your thoughts and emotions, you can gain clarity and self-awareness so you can effectively reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. Journaling gives you an unfiltered expression of your feelings, and it can be a safe outlet for any intense emotions you may be experiencing. The practice of journaling is to make you more mindful, give you the space to reflect, and solve your problems. Over time, this leads to a greater sense of emotional regulation and well-being.


In addition to being a therapeutic force, journaling fosters creativity and a high sense of self-expression, giving you the space for personal growth and exploration. You can think of journaling as a tool for processing past events, setting future goals, and tracking progress over time. Many people who journal report that it helps them better understand their inner world, including their thoughts and triggers. By gaining this level of awareness, it can contribute to your coping skills and emotional resilience. Whether you journal daily or periodically, journaling is an accessible mental health tool and it can be an effective practice for maintaining your mental health.

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How to Break the Cycle of Obsessive Thoughts

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How to Break the Cycle of Obsessive Thoughts

Have you ever experienced the same thoughts over and over again? Do you dwell on these thoughts, and the negative feelings that come along with it? The repetitive, often negative aspect of thought rumination can contribute to feelings of anxiety and depression, as well as worsen existing conditions.


Rumination is when you feel stuck in a cycle of negative thoughts. Rumination is an obsessive form of thinking that includes excessive, repetitive thoughts or themes that conflict with other mental activity, according to the American Psychological Association (APA). Although thought rumination typically occurs for individuals with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), anyone can struggle with obsessive thinking. 


Rumination can transform worry into a habit or a way of life. Obsessive thinking can be a hard cycle to break, but it is possible! Continue reading this blog to learn how to break the cycle of obsessive thoughts.

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How To Not Cancel Plans When You Are Feeling Anxious

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How To Not Cancel Plans When You Are Feeling Anxious

At one point or another, we have all been there. Research shows that 19.1% of United States adults have had an anxiety disorder in the past year. You made plans that sounded fun and exciting but, now, the nerves are starting to set in. Maybe it is a date with a potential love interest. Perhaps it is attending a party where you do not know many people. Suddenly, the idea of going out and staying true to your commitment feels overwhelming. Whether you are just generally looking to avoid discomfort or you have a fear of social situations, anxiety can make you feel like pressing send on the “Sorry I can’t make it tonight” text message and hiding under your blanket. 


However, consider this- what if you did not let anxiety dictate your life? If you struggle with wanting to cancel plans last minute due to anxiety, rest assured that there are practical tips available to help you navigate your anxious emotions and stay committed to your plans without feeling overwhelmed. From mindset shifts to healthy coping skills, you can show up for yourself and other people.

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