toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
trauma counseling, nyc counselor, nj therapist, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

When you think of a child, you probably imagine a young person who is resilient and fast-moving. These traits may cause you to believe that situations do not leave a lasting impact on children’s emotional health; however, that is not the case. If left unsolved, your emotions that came from a traumatic experience as a child can live in your subconscious mind. This will continue to affect you until you detect, process, and solve it. In order to heal childhood trauma as an adult, you have to learn how to process painful emotions.

A healthy way to respond to childhood trauma occurs right after the trauma has taken place. When the trauma occurs, you recognize that it is an offense to yourself. Afterward, you would feel your emotions and acknowledge the fact that the offense does not dictate anything about you personally. In other words, you do not make a negative meaning out of what occurred. Generally, it is rare for people to react in this manner.

This process is not automatic. Certain emotions, like rage and unhappiness, are difficult to express. On top of that, some cultures may view this outpouring of emotions to be socially unacceptable. Therefore, this causes many people to suppress their emotions. For a kid, this process is even more burdensome. For instance, someone may comment on a child’s weight or a part of their body which can cause a long-lasting inner dialogue to occur in the kid’s head, creating body dysmorphia. While this can happen to adults as well, it may be easier for an adult to push aside outside commentary in comparison to a child.

How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

anxiety counseling

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3 Ways to Relieve Sleep Anxiety

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3 Ways to Relieve Sleep Anxiety

If you have sleep anxiety, you know how daunting bedtime can be. The constant tossing and turning. Feeling like you have a million things on your mind. Remembering those pesky tasks that you forgot to do throughout the day. No matter what you do, you can never seem to get comfortable and fully shut your mind off. 

Anxiety can help the body stay alert and focused, but there are situations where you have an anxious reaction to a seemingly normal life event, like sleeping. Anxiety with racing thoughts and physical symptoms can make it difficult to sleep. Anxiety in and of itself is a temporary experience but consistent anxiety symptoms can fully develop into an anxiety disorder. Luckily, you can learn about the causes of your nighttime anxiety and techniques on how to lessen your anxiety at night by working with a sleep therapist at Anchor Therapy. 

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Navigating Train and Subway Anxiety: A Commuter’s Guide from Hoboken and Jersey City to New York City

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Navigating Train and Subway Anxiety: A Commuter’s Guide from Hoboken and Jersey City to New York City

Fear of crime on public transportation is a big concern in a lot of cities throughout the United States and, as Hoboken and Jersey City commuters understand, New York City is no exception to this phenomenon. With constant news coverage highlighting the fear-inducing stories of physical violence occurring in the city, anxiety and stress levels naturally spike.

When you are on-edge, it may feel like every little thing is enhancing your anxiety from the screech of the train on the tracks to the sea of faces you see passing you by. There are many intricacies of train and subway anxiety that a Hoboken or Jersey City commuter can experience on their journey into New York City. Continue reading this blog to learn about the contributing factors of public transportation anxiety and how to apply practical strategies to navigate your anxiety concerns with strength!

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Surviving Summer Internship Application Stress: Strategies for Stevens Institute Students in Hoboken

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Surviving Summer Internship Application Stress: Strategies for Stevens Institute Students in Hoboken

In the modern-day world, it may feel like your academics come second to real world experience. After all, people often say that experience is everything, but how do you get this experience in the workforce? Especially if you are a freshman in college, the process of finding a college internship can feel overwhelming and you may not feel qualified for any of the positions that interest you. You may even find that a lot of the entry-level internships require you to have previous work or internship experience. Needless to say, the hours of time and dedication spent towards researching companies and preparing application materials can begin to feel hopeless.

While everyone is discussing their summer plans, you may feel a wave of anxiety running throughout your body since you are still awaiting your answer. Whether you are procrastinating the summer internship application process or you are waiting to hear back from employers, stress will naturally occur. While it can be tempting to let your stress consume you and to dwell on your current circumstance, that will not help your mental health in the long-run. Luckily, there are strategies you can adopt in your daily routine to put your mind at ease.

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4 Ways to Cope with the Sunday Scaries

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4 Ways to Cope with the Sunday Scaries

We have all felt it at one point or another. Maybe you are catching up on your favorite reality show on a Sunday night and all of a sudden, the Sunday Scaries creep in. Or maybe you are out with your friends having a ‘Sunday Funday’ when you start to feel the impending doom of your reality- tomorrow is Monday and you will return back to your regularly scheduled program. One moment you can be laughing and joking with your loved ones and, the next second, you are intensely focused on your never-ending to-do list for the upcoming week.

You may become consumed with stressful thoughts, from a not-so-ideal work environment to an upcoming exam. As you may have guessed, experiencing these high levels of stress and anxiety right when you are about to wrap your time off is not healthy.

Whether you call it the Sunday Scaries, the Sunday Blues, or the Dread, they all mean the same thing and they are a very real feeling everyone has experienced. While there is no universal cure for the Sunday Dread, there are some ways to cope.

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How Psychodynamic Therapy Can Help You Overcome Anticipatory Anxiety

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How Psychodynamic Therapy Can Help You Overcome Anticipatory Anxiety

At some point in time, every person has experienced anticipatory anxiety. Perhaps you are a teen who is preparing for your driving exam. Or you are an adult feeling anxious about becoming a new parent. Whatever situation you are experiencing, you can take comfort in knowing that anxiety is your body’s normal response to stress.

Most people tend to wonder or even stress about future situations or occurrences to some extent, but anticipatory anxiety can also become severe. Extremely high levels of anticipatory anxiety can have a negative impact on your daily life and everyday functioning.

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4 Ways to Manage Your Relationship Anxiety

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4 Ways to Manage Your Relationship Anxiety

Relationship anxiety can simply be defined as feelings of insecurity, worry, and doubt about your relationship, making you question your compatibility and future with your partner. Contrary to what you might believe, it is normal to have some level of anxiety about your relationship. You may question your significant other’s past partner or question if your long-term goals match up. But, if your relationship anxiety is beginning to cause severe issues for you, it is a sign that something is off.

Relationship anxiety can become an issue when it interferes with the growth of your relationship or even impacts other areas of your life, such as not being able to concentrate at the office. To help with this, read our blog “3 Ways to Achieve Work-Life Balance.” 

When you are feeling insecure in your relationship, you may feel easily stressed. In other cases, you may have a hard time deciphering your emotions. This inability to process your feelings can have problematic results, like separation anxiety or even burnout for your relationship.

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Why Do We Cancel Plans When We’re Anxious?

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Why Do We Cancel Plans When We’re Anxious?

We have all been there before- your anxiety creeps up, makes you rethink why you said “yes” to the plans in the first place, and then, eventually, you start brainstorming reasons as to why you are canceling. 

It can be uncomfortable to say “no”, especially if you struggle with pleasing people. If you think this may be something you struggle with, check out our blog “How To Know If You’re A People-Pleaser and The Psychology Behind It.” You may feel like you are letting someone down when you say “no” or you may feel like you are not good enough for the task at hand. Sometimes, your anxiety can get in the way and make it impossible for you to follow through on commitments.

In its most basic form, having plans can give you something fun to look forward to on your calendar and can fulfill your basic need for human connection. But, at its worst, it can leave you feeling like you are obligated to do something, dreaming about crossing out this event on your calendar in a bold black Sharpie.

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Is There A Way To Overcome Claustrophobia?

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Is There A Way To Overcome Claustrophobia?

Claustrophobia is a situational phobia that is caused by an intense and irrational fear of tight or crowded spaces. This fear of confined spaces can become an issue when the phobia interferes with your ability to function in daily life whether that be at work, school, or other activities. 

If we really wanted to, we could rationalize many fears. For example, you may have a fear of flying, also known as aerophobia, due to losing a loved one in a plane crash. This grief may have caused second-hand trauma which left you feeling extremely scared. If this is something you struggle with, check out our past blog “8 Tips To Overcome Flight Anxiety.”

We all try to avoid things or places that make us feel uncomfortable, but there is a distinct difference between a fear and a phobia. A phobia is an intense and irrational fear toward a thing(s) or situation(s). With phobias, it is also important to note that the fear you are experiencing does not match the actual danger presented in the feared situation or object.

When your phobia interferes with your ability to complete basic daily tasks, it is highly recommended that you seek the help of a phobia specialist. Phobias can negatively impact your life, straining your relationships and lowering your self-esteem. 

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How Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) Decreases Anxiety

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How Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) Decreases Anxiety

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, often simply referred to as REBT, is a form of psychotherapy that can help you to identify self-defeating thoughts and emotions. From there, you are able to challenge the unreasonable and unproductive feelings in order to replace them with more healthier and fruitful beliefs. 

REBT was created in the mid-1950s by a psychologist named Albert Ellis. This form of psychotherapy focuses on the present moment so you can understand how any unhealthy thoughts and beliefs you hold can trigger emotional distress. As a result of this emotional distress, unhealthy actions and behaviors can occur which can interfere with your goals and overall life.

The REBT approach will encourage you to dispute your irrational thinking so you can develop healthy emotional self-regulation skills to manage your anxiety. 

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How Childhood Trauma Can Cause Anxiety, Depression, & PTSD

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How Childhood Trauma Can Cause Anxiety, Depression, & PTSD

Childhood trauma can have a long lasting impact on people. If you suffer from childhood trauma, you may be more at risk for developing anxiety, depression, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), and other mental disorders. By unpacking your trauma with a trauma therapist or anxiety counselor, you'll be able to process those memories and emotions, and feel like your best self again!

What Is Childhood Trauma?

Childhood trauma is the experience of an event by a child or teen that is emotionally painful or distressful, which often results in lasting mental and physical effects. Childhood trauma can occur when a child witnesses or experiences overwhelming negative events in childhood. Children are too young to process events they experienced which causes them to repress, or bury, the memory.

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3 Ways to Manage Your Physical Anxiety Symptoms

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3 Ways to Manage Your Physical Anxiety Symptoms

If you have anxiety, you know what it feels like to be worried, nervous, and/or afraid about typical everyday events. Your anxiety can feel upsetting and difficult to manage. Anxiety can make your life a daily struggle, and may even leave you questioning many things- from your safety to your own anxiety symptoms. 

Oftentimes, anxiety can physically manifest in your body. Many people may think that they are being dramatic or simply imagining the physical symptoms of anxiety, but they are 100% real. Some people with anxiety may experience physical symptoms while others may not. 

Think back to a time where you felt nervous. Perhaps you were preparing for a big presentation at work and you noticed that your palms started to sweat and your legs felt shaky. Maybe you were preparing for a first date, and started to experience some dating anxiety. You may have begun to feel sick to your stomach and experienced an increased heart rate. You might have linked these physical symptoms to nervousness, but were unsure of the exact reason as to why you did not feel good.

Most people will experience anxiety on occasion; however, if you have an anxiety disorder, these feelings and symptoms may be the norm for you.

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3 Steps to Overcoming Agoraphobia

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3 Steps to Overcoming Agoraphobia

Agoraphobia, a rare type of anxiety disorder, involves being afraid of certain situations or places that make you feel trapped. Oftentimes, agoraphobia is mischaracterized. People may believe that the disorder only consists of a fear of open spaces; however, the reality of the disorder is much more complex. In addition to the fear or feeling of being trapped, there is a standard fear of feeling helpless or being embarrassed in public situations which may spark a panic attack.

The triggers of agoraphobia vary from person-to-person. For example, for some people, a trigger may be an airplane while, for others, it is standing in a line at the grocery store waiting to checkout. Agoraphobia is not necessarily the fear of one place specifically. Instead, it is the fear that, if something bad were to occur, escape would be difficult. Because of this, another fear is developed about potentially having a panic attack in public.

When you confront agoraphobia, it can be difficult. If you struggle with the disorder, you are used to living life in an automatic state of dread. This fear can become so large that you avoid going in public at all costs, particularly in areas that are especially crowded. Overcoming agoraphobia can be a painstakingly difficult process since it involves confronting your fears, but please know it is completely possible! Overcoming agoraphobia does not occur overnight. With the help of a therapist for agoraphobia, you can get back to feeling like your best self again.

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3 Ways to Overcome Health Anxiety

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3 Ways to Overcome Health Anxiety

If you have health anxiety, you have an irrational and obsessive worry that you have a serious medical condition. Health anxiety takes other names, such as hypochondria and illness anxiety. Overall, healthy anxiety is marked when you have an imagination of physical symptoms of an illness.

In other cases, you may misinterpret minor or normal bodily sensations as symptoms of a serious disease. Even if medical professionals reassure you that you do not have an illness, you may have a hard time believing them and trusting their professional advice.

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4 Ways To Cope With A Panic Disorder

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4 Ways To Cope With A Panic Disorder

Some people experience panic attacks once or twice during their life, but others experience them constantly and more abruptly. Nobody likes to have panic attacks, and having them non-stop can take a toll on you. Panic disorders are exhausting and scary. A panic disorder is basically an ongoing case of unpredictable, intense panic attacks. The mental and physical symptoms can be so intense that seeking outside help, like the assistance of a panic disorder therapist near you, can be a great way to help you get the support you need.


Despite your best efforts to convince yourself that you are okay, panic attacks can still occur. While there is no universal magic cure to panic attacks, there are effective methods that you can learn to help manage your symptoms. This blog will give you a deeper understanding of panic attacks and panic disorder and what you can do to overcome and cope with them.

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How Can CBT Help College Students Struggling with Anxiety?

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How Can CBT Help College Students Struggling with Anxiety?

While college can be a great time for growth, social exploration, and fun, it can also be a time filled with stress. Especially during this time of the year, final exams are in full swing and you may feel like you have a lot on your plate. Whether you are just dealing with the stress of your schoolwork or you are also trying to balance work and other responsibilities, college can easily breed feelings of anxiety.

In addition to your responsibilities, many people struggle with the changes that college can bring about. You are no longer surrounded by your family and friends. Your everyday routine has changed in a big way.

Some common causes of anxiety in college students include:

  • Academic pressure

  • Moving away from home

  • New social situations

  • Financial stressors

Many college students report having anxiety so you are not alone! By learning about your anxiety and working with a therapist who specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, also known as CBT, you can make positive changes in your life and learn how to manage your anxiety!

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5 Effective Ways to Reduce Stress During Final Exams

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5 Effective Ways to Reduce Stress During Final Exams

Every college student knows that final exam week sparks unavoidable stress. Even as students look around their college campus during this time of the semester, you can see that stress taking place in the form of anxiety and sleep deprivation.

Although stress is an inevitable component of life, it can easily take a toll on all aspects of your health- including physical, emotional, and mental health. It can also interfere with your academic success. The stress that college students typically deal with involves alterations in one’s lifestyle, an enlarging workload, new duties, and interpersonal relationships. Finals week can add extra pressure onto this already-stressful situation.

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5 Ways Exercise Benefits Your Mental Health

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5 Ways Exercise Benefits Your Mental Health

Typically, when you think of exercise, the physical benefits of movement immediately come to mind. It is known that regular exercise can help you:

  • Control your weight

  • Reduce your risk of diabetes

  • Lower your blood pressure

  • Increase your energy

In addition to these amazing advantages, did you know that exercise has psychological benefits as well?

Regular exercise has been proven to keep your memory sharp and ease symptoms of depression and anxiety. Lifestyle modifications are often used to improve quality of life and overall health, and exercise is no exception to these adjustments. Lifestyle changes that highlight moderate-intensity activity are the most beneficial. Additionally, the positive effects of movement on mental health encompass self-efficacy, social interaction, and distraction. Exercise has the ability to enhance your self-efficacy, also known as the belief in your capabilities. Movement can act as a form of social interaction in various ways. For instance, you may have a ‘workout buddy’ or you may engage in group classes. Lastly, exercise can act as a distraction from life stressors, giving you much needed time to mentally rejuvenate.

If you would like to learn about the mental health benefits of exercise, keep reading!

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The Top Reasons Why You Should Practice Mindfulness

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The Top Reasons Why You Should Practice Mindfulness

Do you need to clear your mind? Do you find it difficult to focus on one thing? If so, you might benefit from learning about mindfulness.

Mindfulness is our ability as humans to be fully aware and present of our current situations. When we are aware of where we are and what we are doing, it helps us not overreact or be overwhelmed by external circumstances. Regardless of your location or state of mind, mindfulness can help you center yourself and bring you back to a state of calmness. Everyone has access to mindfulness; you just need to know how to cultivate it.

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How Meditation Can Lead To Stress Reduction

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How Meditation Can Lead To Stress Reduction

As the COVID-19 pandemic is slowly coming to a halt and safety precautions are being lifted, people are returning to their pre-pandemic lives. The embrace of packed schedules can unfortunately create stress. A lot of people are feeling stressed during these times, particularly with work or school-related stress.

Some stressful life events may include:

  • Job loss

  • Starting a new job

  • Moving

  • Death of a loved one

  • Major illness or injury

  • Divorce

  • Marriage

  • Retirement

  • Transitioning to adulthood

  • Pregnancy

Broadly, stress can be described as a change that creates physical, emotional, or psychological tension. To help ease your worries, you can turn to meditation. Meditation is the active practice of training your concentration and awareness to achieve a clear and serene mental and emotional state.

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Reflecting on Mental Health during the COVID-19 Pandemic

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Reflecting on Mental Health during the COVID-19 Pandemic

As the COVID-19 pandemic is slowly coming to a halt, people are finally resuming their pre-pandemic activities and busy schedules. While this requires an adjustment from the adopted “new” normal, many businesses are starting to boom again, and families and friends are being reunited. As society comes together to collectively battle the virus with mass vaccinations, an opportunity presents itself to reflect on how your mental health was impacted during quarantine and mandated social distancing. It is essential to understand personal reactions to the pandemic to conform to previous routines and re-enter society successfully.