marriage counseling

What to Expect in Sex Therapy

What to Expect in Sex Therapy

If you are looking to achieve satisfaction in your sex life, sex therapy may be the answer. Working with a licensed sex therapist can help you as an individual or couple in resolving common sexual issues, such as intimacy issues and sexual dysfunction. Sex counseling is just like any other form of talk therapy - you sit down with a couples counselor to work through your problems.

Some couples can take care of their sexual relationship on their own while others may need some assistance and that is perfectly okay. There needs to be a balance of “I” and “we” in a relationship and your sex therapist will likely stress this concept to you.

4 Ways to Manage Your Relationship Anxiety

4 Ways to Manage Your Relationship Anxiety

Relationship anxiety can simply be defined as feelings of insecurity, worry, and doubt about your relationship, making you question your compatibility and future with your partner. Contrary to what you might believe, it is normal to have some level of anxiety about your relationship. You may question your significant other’s past partner or question if your long-term goals match up. But, if your relationship anxiety is beginning to cause severe issues for you, it is a sign that something is off.

Relationship anxiety can become an issue when it interferes with the growth of your relationship or even impacts other areas of your life, such as not being able to concentrate at the office. To help with this, read our blog “3 Ways to Achieve Work-Life Balance.” 

When you are feeling insecure in your relationship, you may feel easily stressed. In other cases, you may have a hard time deciphering your emotions. This inability to process your feelings can have problematic results, like separation anxiety or even burnout for your relationship.

How To Survive Your In-Laws: A Guide To Family Therapy

How To Survive Your In-Laws: A Guide To Family Therapy

If you find it difficult to deal with your in-laws, you are not alone. On some level, every couple struggles with their in-laws from time to time. Just because you may be dealing with some issues with your in-laws, it does not mean that you have an unhealthy relationship. It all comes down to how you tackle the problem together as a team. If you believe you may be in an unhealthy partnership, check out our blog “How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship.” 

What you will learn quickly through your exploration together as a couple in mental health counseling sessions is that seeing eye-to-eye with your partner about your in-laws matters more than seeing eye-to-eye with your in-laws. 

Learning how to build a relationship with your in-laws is challenging for many couples. You can choose to view it as a chore that you want to quickly and insufficiently fix or as a ‘project’ to tackle together as a couple. This ‘project’ includes communication, trust, and effort.

What We Learned From The Relationship Dynamic of Succession’s Shiv and Tom

What We Learned From The Relationship Dynamic of Succession’s Shiv and Tom

Succession, a comedy-drama television series, has been a HBO hit show since its release in 2018. The television series follows the Roy family who are the owners of Waystar Roy Company, a global media and entertainment empire. The family’s patriarch, Logan Roy, runs the show at Waystar Roy Company while his four children fight for control of the company due to Logan’s wavering health.

Logan has four children- three sons and one daughter. Logan’s oldest son Connor Roy is generally estranged from the family, and does not have much interest in the family company. Instead, Connor has readjusted his interest to politics, setting his sights on the United States presidency. Next is Logan’s power-hungry son, Kendall Roy. Kendall wants to take over the company but has not yet been able to gain his dad’s full vote of confidence. One part of Kendall’s rocky professional and personal relationships is his struggle with substance abuse. Logan’s third son, Roman Roy, is perhaps one of the most dynamic characters of the show, but his constant lack of focus and low maturity level prevent him from advancing in the company. Finally, Siobhan Roy, also known as “Shiv”, has natural leadership skills and closely resembles her father. At first, she rather put her focus into politics, working as a political consultant; however, she decides to jump ship to Waystar once she spots an opportunity. 

One of the most interesting relationship dynamics of the series is the connection between Shiv Roy and her husband, Tom Wambsgans. For any fan of the hit-show Succession, the power differences between Shiv and Tom seem apparent. From Shiv’s tense looks and cutthroat nature to Tom’s vulnerability and looks of defeat after conversations with the Roy family, their relationship is dictated by power differences and incomplete exchanges.

How to Heal After Infidelity

How to Heal After Infidelity

The truth is that working through an affair in a relationship is difficult. On both sides, it requires a great deal of vulnerability, energy, time, work, and commitment. Affair recovery is a process of healing your relationship on a mental, emotional, and physical level after infidelity occurs. Typically, the process of recovery after infidelity can take anywhere from six months to two years, but it is important to remember that each couple is unique. For some couples, it may take a little shorter or longer to fully recover.

The painful process of recovery after an affair requires compassion, strength, and humility. An affair does equate to intense emotional pain; however, that pain does not have to end a relationship. There are ways to rebuild your connection with your partner even after an affair if you are both willing and able to put in the work.

Don’t Worry Darling: How It Portrays Toxic Relationships

Don’t Worry Darling: How It Portrays Toxic Relationships

*Spoilers about the film Don’t Worry Darling ahead!*

In 2022, director, Olivia Wilde, produced the film Don’t Worry Darling, starring Harry Styles and Florence Pugh. Florence's character is Alice and Harry Styles depicts her husband Jack. The film follows Alice and Jack’s marriage as they live in a utopian place called Victory Town. While the lives and partnership of Alice and Jack seems perfect at first, the cracks in their relationship are revealed throughout the course of the film. The “once-perfect” relationship we saw between Alice and Jack dissolves, and the audience witnesses their connection for what it truly is- a toxic relationship. 

Becoming trapped in a toxic relationship can happen easily. When you are being manipulated and gaslighted, it can be hard to create an exit plan or to even see the warning signs. When caught in these relationships, you can develop feelings of anxiety and depression along with low self esteem for always being scrutinized and belittled. Being able to recognize the toxic antics of your partner can save you from a downward spiral of emotions. If you are struggling, do not hesitate to reach out to a licensed therapist today. Seeking counseling can be on the individual level, and can benefit the couple as well.  

Continue reading along if you want to learn more about the role of toxic relationships in the hit film Don’t Worry Darling.  

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How LGBTQIA+ Couples Counseling Is Unique

How LGBTQIA+ Couples Counseling Is Unique

Are you in a LGBTQIA+ relationship and experiencing frequent conflicts or disagreements in your relationship? Do you and your partner struggle with meaningful connection, infidelity, or lack of intimacy? Are you in need of a LGBTQIA+ couples therapist who is culturally competent and understands LGBTQIA+ issues? If so, keep reading this article!

Couples counseling can benefit any couple at any time, but it can be especially beneficial for LGBTQIA+ couples who face a unique set of challenges. Therapeutic work in the LGBTQIA+ community is different. Typically, the focus of couples counseling, particularly in the media, can be centered around heterosexual, monogamous couples. The lack of representation you may witness is no need to stop you from seeking the help your relationship deserves and needs.

You may feel stuck in your relationship at the moment. For example, your partnership may look very different from what you envisioned for yourself. You may have issues surrounding communication or need to learn how to work collaboratively to tackle life issues. Like many other couples, when you avoid these behaviors, they can turn into patterns that negatively affect your relationship in the long-run. These patterns can manifest as daily fights or chronic silent treatments.

Whether you and your partner are battling intimacy issues, exploring the possibility of an open relationship, or dealing with the aftermath of infidelity, these situations can breed excess stress, anxiety, and the weakening of a connection for any couple. When you couple these problems with identity-specific struggles, the setbacks can worsen the quality of your relationship, making LGBTQIA+ couples therapy that much more necessary.

5 Reasons Why Marriage Counseling May Be Helpful for You

5 Reasons Why Marriage Counseling May Be Helpful for You

At some point, every couple experiences conflict. From financial issues to constant bickering, there may be some cracks in your relationship. If your relationship is hitting a bump in the road, there is no reason to panic. In many instances, you may be able to fix these issues on your own. However, there may be a time when you feel that your problems get out of control and become hard to manage. In these situations, marriage counseling, also known as couples counseling, can be extremely helpful.

While couples counseling may only be seen as a resource for relationships in crisis, that is not always the case. In fact, many couples who are not experiencing any major issues find couples therapy to be helpful. They view therapy as a chance to get closer to their partner and get to know their loved one better. Marriage counseling provides couples with tools for healthier, more effective communication.

While falling in love can be an exciting and happy time, sustaining a marriage may have its obstacles. Whether the issues revolve around your partner working late nights or the stress of parenthood, many difficulties can occur in any relationship.

Understanding the Five Love Languages to Improve Your Relationship

Understanding the Five Love Languages to Improve Your Relationship

A crucial component of a healthy relationship is understanding how to express love to your significant other. Getting to know your partner may take some time. The more time you spend with them, the more you understand their personality, likes, dislikes, and hobbies. Even though you may know your partner well, it may still be difficult to find a meaningful method of communication that your partner resonates with, understands, and fulfills their emotional needs. Therefore, Dr. Gary Chapman, an American author, radio talk show host, and marriage therapist, devised the five love languages.

As a marriage counselor, Dr. Chapman worked with many couples throughout the years and, in the 1990s, he identified a trend amongst all of the couples’ arguments. During marriage counseling, many couples would express that they were trying their best, but their compliments, gifts, and/or gestures were going unnoticed. The other partner did not even notice the acts that they were supposed to be grateful for. Instead, they were hoping that their partner would do something that they could recognize and appreciate. Dr. Chapman realized that these breaks in communication and affection were rooted in different definitions of love.

Dr. Chapman found five distinct ways that people receive and showcase love. Generally, people have one to two languages that they prefer.

The five love languages are as follows:

  1. Quality Time

  2. Acts of Service

  3. Words of Affirmation

  4. Gift Giving

  5. Physical Touch

4 Ways to Repair A Relationship After Infidelity

4 Ways to Repair A Relationship After Infidelity

While infidelity is a big obstacle in a relationship, it can also be seen as an opportunity for positive growth and change. Infidelity does not mean that your relationship is over. Luckily, there are many ways to heal and construct a healthy relationship once again.

Trust is a crucial part of any relationship. Trust can be broken in many ways, from minor mishaps to big mistakes. Unfortunately, cheating can break a bond and your level of confidence in your relationship. Infidelity is not always like what we see in the movies and television shows. In other words, it is not always what we think. Many times, infidelity occurs due to a lack of emotional connection, not a lack of attraction.

The 5 Major Causes for Divorce and How to Avoid Them

The 5 Major Causes for Divorce and How to Avoid Them

You may feel as if your relationship has recently become a raw nerve. Every little thing is hitting that nerve and triggering an argument. You and your partner can not seem to get through a day without fighting. It feels absolutely exhausting. It may seem like there is no other option but to take time apart. You find you are walking on eggshells in fear of triggering the next disagreement. You both are growing further apart from one another.

Don’t lose hope yet- there may be a way to heal this raw nerve and decrease the frequency and intensity of arguments. Seeking out couples counseling and better understanding the risks for divorce can help you significantly shift the dynamics that have been occurring in your marriage. Identifying the common communication errors and working on minimizing them will make a positive change in how you relate to one another.

Couples Counseling: 7 Types Of Relationships That Can Benefit From Therapy

Couples Counseling: 7 Types Of Relationships That Can Benefit From Therapy

Are you feeling like you are growing apart in your relationship, bickering over small things, or just becoming more frustrated and impatient with one another? Are arguments occurring more frequently and more intensely?

All relationships experience arguments, but at times navigating through the conflict may seem more and more challenging. We find ourselves falling into communication cycles that we cannot seem to break out of and we don’t know what to do differently. On top of it, the pandemic is amplifying tensions and bringing out those underlying cracks in our relationship. We keep trying to struggle through it with our partners, but are finding ourselves feeling increasingly frustrated, angry and exhausted.

Whether your relationship could just use a tune up or you are feeling desperate for change, couples counseling can be the tool that helps get you what you need in your relationship. Seeking help earlier in the process is a benefit because unhealthy behaviors can be more difficult to change as time passes (but never impossible!). We all have behaviors we can work on and therapy can give us the opportunity to work on ourselves while also developing a better understanding of our spouse or partner(s).

5 Ways Marriage Counseling Can Get You Back on Track After Having a Baby

5 Ways Marriage Counseling Can Get You Back on Track After Having a Baby

Having a baby is an exciting, scary, and all-consuming time in the lives of any couple growing their family. As a marriage counselor, it’s important to recognize that a new baby also brings a new set of challenges. If you start to feel like your marriage has taken a back seat to everything else life is throwing at you, it may be time to consider asking for help to get back on track.

Where there was once time for your partner and your own personal time, the schedule may now be packed with feedings, diaper changes, chores, and what seems to be an endless to-do list. When every moment of the day has to be scheduled and you add a global pandemic to the equation, connecting with your partner could unknowingly fall to the bottom of the priority list.

The Anxiety and Uncertainty of Planning a Wedding during a Pandemic

The Anxiety and Uncertainty of Planning a Wedding during a Pandemic

The COVID-19 pandemic has left many Brides with feelings of uncertainty. If you are planning a wedding during this pandemic, those moments of uncertainty are likely magnified with feelings of anxiety, fear, and frustration. So many Brides and couples planning weddings right now are struggling to manage the planning process. As a psychotherapist, I can give you some tools that can be used to help you cope with the stress of planning.

How Defenses Get In The Way Of Healthy Communication In Relationships

How Defenses Get In The Way Of Healthy Communication In Relationships

When it comes to communicating as a couple, you may find that you or your partner’s defense mechanisms are getting in the way of healthy communication. This may lead to what feels like constant fighting and a fractured relationship. Defense mechanisms in a relationship can be really dangerous. This often looks like yelling, giving the silent treatment, eye rolling, making excuses, justifying behavior, or being sarcastic. These reactions will arise when you are in a conflict in your relationship and you begin to feel hurt, sad, or angry and your self-esteem is being threatened. These cycles can leave you feeling helpless; however, healthy communication is absolutely possible. By changing your subconscious cues, you can begin to break the cycle of fighting and create healthier communication.

Tips and Tools to Improve Communication with your Partner through COVID-19

Tips and Tools to Improve Communication with your Partner through COVID-19

When it comes to improving communication in a relationship, it takes more than just talking more to your partner. It is the way you speak, what you say, what they hear, and much more. As previously discussed, healthy and meaningful communication is built in many ways. One of the biggest issues that couples come across when communicating is oversimplifying it to the belief that one person talks and the other listens. Sure, in some way this is true, but communicating is an active skill and both the speaker and person listening need to be engaged and attuned.

Communicating with Your Partner through COVID-19

Communicating with Your Partner through COVID-19

As a couple’s therapist, the most common issue I see among couples is a breakdown in communication. This does not mean that they are unable to communicate, but that their communication no longer makes them feel connected. In a relationship, we all want to feel heard, seen, and understood. This often gets lost in translation, and is even more difficult to repair under the current circumstance. While many are spending more time than ever together during the pandemic, healthy and effective communication can take a back seat to external stressors. It can be hard not to get caught up in talking about the basics: work, kids, to-do lists and so on. If you are looking to improve communication with your partner, you may need to challenge yourself to do something different and outside of your comfort zone. A strong and fulfilling relationship needs a strong foundation, and that foundation is almost always built on healthy communication. In this first blog of a two-part blog series, I will discuss two key types of communication that couples have and the common problems that may arise for each.

Tips for Parenting During a Pandemic

Tips for Parenting During a Pandemic

As we enter week 6 of the COVID-19 quarantine in Hoboken, New Jersey, I have noticed how difficult and defeating this time has been for parents. The challenges of parenting during this pandemic can seem endless and insurmountable. Many parents are trying to balance the stress of work, full time care of their children, teaching their children, their own well-being, and mental health with none of the support they once relied upon. Exhausted and overwhelmed, these daily struggles start to build up and make us feel like the light at the end of the tunnel has dimmed or disappeared altogether. With so much uncertainty about the future of the world and your family, anxiety and fear are at an all-time high. This level of pressure combined with the collective unease of society makes it extremely difficult to handle day to day stressors with the same degree of self-control that many feel they once had.

How Couples Are Taking Advantage of Telehealth Counseling during COVID-19

How Couples Are Taking Advantage of Telehealth Counseling during COVID-19

Telehealth has always been a useful tool to provide therapy services to many individuals over the years. It allows those who would otherwise be unable to attend regular sessions access even if their life and schedule make it difficult. During this pandemic of the spread of COVID-19, couples are able to take advantage of this time to start couples counseling and work on their relationship through telehealth sessions. Many are wondering how telehealth works when it comes to couples counseling. As a couples counselor, I have been providing these services through telehealth for years and have found it to be equally effective as in-person sessions. I hope to answer some questions and concerns while also reassuring anyone interested in telehealth during this time of isolation that you can get help regardless of circumstance.