toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
trauma counseling, nyc counselor, nj therapist, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

When you think of a child, you probably imagine a young person who is resilient and fast-moving. These traits may cause you to believe that situations do not leave a lasting impact on children’s emotional health; however, that is not the case. If left unsolved, your emotions that came from a traumatic experience as a child can live in your subconscious mind. This will continue to affect you until you detect, process, and solve it. In order to heal childhood trauma as an adult, you have to learn how to process painful emotions.

A healthy way to respond to childhood trauma occurs right after the trauma has taken place. When the trauma occurs, you recognize that it is an offense to yourself. Afterward, you would feel your emotions and acknowledge the fact that the offense does not dictate anything about you personally. In other words, you do not make a negative meaning out of what occurred. Generally, it is rare for people to react in this manner.

This process is not automatic. Certain emotions, like rage and unhappiness, are difficult to express. On top of that, some cultures may view this outpouring of emotions to be socially unacceptable. Therefore, this causes many people to suppress their emotions. For a kid, this process is even more burdensome. For instance, someone may comment on a child’s weight or a part of their body which can cause a long-lasting inner dialogue to occur in the kid’s head, creating body dysmorphia. While this can happen to adults as well, it may be easier for an adult to push aside outside commentary in comparison to a child.

How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

mental health blog

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Insights from Paris Hilton’s Mental Health Healing Journey

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Insights from Paris Hilton’s Mental Health Healing Journey

Paris Hilton, an American media personality and businesswoman, made headlines in 2020 when her documentary, This is Paris, premiered. The documentary shed light on intimate details of her personal life, detailing her day-to-day corporate duties and past abuse, resulting in trauma suffered at a series of boarding schools. Reports show that, within the first month of the documentary’s release, it acquired over 16 million views.

Today, Paris has a successful show on the streaming platform Peacock titled Paris in Love. The first season of the show largely focused on Paris finding love with her now-husband Carter Reum and planning their dream wedding. In the second season of Paris in Love, Paris unveils more details about her past, particularly her childhood and shows how her past trauma has impacted her as an adult. Viewers also get to witness Paris going through another major life transition by bringing a baby boy, Phoenix Baron, into the world.

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Swipe Smart: Navigating Online Dating and Mental Health with Dating Therapy

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Swipe Smart: Navigating Online Dating and Mental Health with Dating Therapy

In a world of swiping left and right on dating apps, it is easy to think that the love of your life could be right at your fingertips. However, if you are someone who is on a dating app, you may have found out the reality that it is not that easy to find your person whether you are looking for something casual, a short-term relationship, or your forever partner.

In other words, modern dating presents its fair share of challenges. There are the practical challenges, such as cycling through the various dating apps, finding compatible people in your area, and carving out the time in your schedule to genuinely connect with others. Then, there are the more emotionally-charged problems, like ghosting, love bombing, and even seeing things take a turn for the ugly when you reject a person.

Instead of waiting around for Mr. Right or Mrs. Right, you can take control of your happiness now by meeting with a dating therapist and continuing to read this helpful blog!

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Fourth Wing: Harnessing Internal Strength in the Face of Chronic Illness

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Fourth Wing: Harnessing Internal Strength in the Face of Chronic Illness

Spoilers ahead for Rebecca Yarros’s novel, Fourth Wing!

Living with a chronic medical condition can significantly impact one's mental health, as the challenges and limitations it presents can take a toll on overall well-being. However, in the new incredible novel Fourth Wing by Rabecca Yarros that has gone viral, we encounter a remarkable 20-year-old female character named Violet Sorrengail who defies the odds and showcases unwavering internal strength despite her battle with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. Giving the heroine of the story a chronic illness is unique and not typically accepted as a large community. However, Rebecca Yarros does an incredible job in seamlessly incorporating the illness into the character and explores the intricate relationship between chronic illness and mental health. Violet’s character shows how her resilience serves as a powerful reminder that a chronic condition does not have to control one's life negatively.

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Why Netflix’s Stutz Is The Best Therapy Documentary

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Why Netflix’s Stutz Is The Best Therapy Documentary

This past November, actor Jonah Hill premiered a documentary centered around his beloved therapist, Phil Stutz. At the beginning of the film the viewer was to be convinced this was one session filmed during one day. It is then revealed that the documentary was filmed over the course of two years because Hill felt he was not getting what he wanted from the film. After this is revealed, Hill confesses that, in order for the film to be the hit he knows it can be, they both need to be more vulnerable. 

With their guards down, they both begin to highlight the mental health tools Stutz (the therapist) has taught Hill (the patient) during his struggles with anxiety and depression. The film is raw and showcases not only the professional relationship Stutz and Hill have formed, but also the friendship they have made. The two have formed a mutualistic friendship in which Hill benefits from Stutz’s guidance, and Stutz has gained a caring friend that keeps him company in his somewhat-isolated life. 

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What We Learned About Mental Health From Harry & Meghan

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What We Learned About Mental Health From Harry & Meghan

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle released their docu series on Netflix, Harry & Meghan, which detailed their high-profile love story. The series starts from the very beginning of their relationship to the institutional challenges that the couple endured and continues to face in the public eye. Most importantly, this documentary reveals some stunning mental health revelations. 
Mental health impacts everyone regardless of gender, race, and socioeconomic status, and Harry & Meghan certainly sheds light on this fact. The docu series highlights Meghan Markle’s battle with depression and suicidal thoughts. It even draws strong parallels between the royal life of Meghan Markle and Princess Diana of Wales, Prince Harry’s mother.

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Selena Gomez’s Raw Honesty With Mental Health: My Mind and Me Documentary

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Selena Gomez’s Raw Honesty With Mental Health: My Mind and Me Documentary

Spoilers ahead if you have not watched Selena Gomez’s documentary, “My Mind and Me” yet!

Selena Gomez’s much-anticipated documentary, entitled My Mind and Me, hit Apple TV on November 2nd, 2022. The documentary follows Selena Gomez, an American singer, actress, producer, and philanthropist, after years of growing up and living life in the public eye. Gomez began acting as a child in Barney & Friends. Soon after, she blossomed into a full-blown star, landing a hit tv show on the Disney channel and becoming one of the most-followed celebrities. However, with all of this success also came its fair share of challenges. Specifically, mental health challenges.

My Mind and Me offers a raw glimpse into the life of Gomez over a six year period. While Gomez has spent much of her life in the spotlight, she largely remains a very private person. The public may know details about Gomez from her famous social relationships, like her friendship with Taylor Swift and previous relationship with Justin Bieber, but we do not know much about Gomez’s personality, let alone her mental health struggles.

After watching My Mind and Me, there are many important lessons we can take away from the documentary.
Gomez opens up the documentary with a pledge, “Let me make a promise. I’ll only tell you my darkest secrets.” This statement holds true for the entirety of the film. Gomez showed an undeniable amount of vulnerability throughout the documentary, encompassing detailing her struggles with Bipolar Disorder to her health battles with the autoimmune disease lupus. Gomez’s level of honesty and bravery is an inspiration to people everywhere.

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How LGBTQIA+ Couples Counseling Is Unique

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How LGBTQIA+ Couples Counseling Is Unique

Are you in a LGBTQIA+ relationship and experiencing frequent conflicts or disagreements in your relationship? Do you and your partner struggle with meaningful connection, infidelity, or lack of intimacy? Are you in need of a LGBTQIA+ couples therapist who is culturally competent and understands LGBTQIA+ issues? If so, keep reading this article!

Couples counseling can benefit any couple at any time, but it can be especially beneficial for LGBTQIA+ couples who face a unique set of challenges. Therapeutic work in the LGBTQIA+ community is different. Typically, the focus of couples counseling, particularly in the media, can be centered around heterosexual, monogamous couples. The lack of representation you may witness is no need to stop you from seeking the help your relationship deserves and needs.

You may feel stuck in your relationship at the moment. For example, your partnership may look very different from what you envisioned for yourself. You may have issues surrounding communication or need to learn how to work collaboratively to tackle life issues. Like many other couples, when you avoid these behaviors, they can turn into patterns that negatively affect your relationship in the long-run. These patterns can manifest as daily fights or chronic silent treatments.

Whether you and your partner are battling intimacy issues, exploring the possibility of an open relationship, or dealing with the aftermath of infidelity, these situations can breed excess stress, anxiety, and the weakening of a connection for any couple. When you couple these problems with identity-specific struggles, the setbacks can worsen the quality of your relationship, making LGBTQIA+ couples therapy that much more necessary.

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7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

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7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

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The Mental Health Benefits of Practicing Yoga

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The Mental Health Benefits of Practicing Yoga

Yoga is practiced by millions of people worldwide. It is thousands of years old, and has both spiritual and philosophical origins. Many Americans who practice yoga do so to receive its physical benefits. However, there are also powerful mental health benefits to the practice.

Contemporary media and various advertisements may have you believing that yoga is nothing more than physical poses; however, that is far from the truth.

Yoga includes many self-disciplinary aspects, such as:

  • Meditation

  • Chanting

  • Mantra

  • Prayer

  • Breath work

  • Ritual

  • Selfless action

The term yoga comes from the word “yuj”, translating to “to bind.” While many people may analyze this term differently, there is one major theme amongst the interpretations- connection.

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5 Ways I Prioritize My Mental Health In College

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5 Ways I Prioritize My Mental Health In College

My name is Madeline and I am a social media intern here at Anchor Therapy. I am currently a junior in college and it has taken me quite a while to figure out how I can prioritize my mental health. Between taking six classes, working two jobs, and trying to balance friendships and schoolwork, it can be very overwhelming and my mental health often used to take a back seat. I always find myself wanting to do everything I can at the same time to make sure I am having the traditional “college experience” that I have heard about my entire life. This year especially I have been making more of an effort to prioritize my mental health and do what is best for me. Here are my top five tips on how to balance your mental health while being in college.

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Find Out If You’re An Introvert or Extrovert

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Find Out If You’re An Introvert or Extrovert

From the Myers Briggs Type Indicator to the Enneagram, there are many personality tests out there that can reveal more about you. Learning more about your personality can be a powerful tool.

Personality tests can provide many advantages, such as:

  • Being able to understand yourself better

  • Helping you choose what path of study you want to pursue

  • Helping you pick a career that suits your interests

  • Enhancing your management skills

  • Teaching you healthy coping mechanisms

  • Making you more empathetic

  • Gaining insight into your mental health

More generally, personality tests can increase your level of self-awareness and help nurture important relationships in your life. A major component of almost all personality tests is whether you are more introverted or more extroverted.

Most likely, you know what side of the spectrum you are on by simply noting if you are more outgoing or shy in your everyday life. However, personality tests can offer more definitive answers. The question of whether you are an extrovert or introvert is more complex than simply being demonstrative or timid.

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How Spencer Accurately Depicts Bulimia

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How Spencer Accurately Depicts Bulimia

Spencer, a 2021 drama and historical film, focuses on the life of Diana, Princess of Wales. While royalty is typically viewed as something aspirational, Spencer showcases the dark side of fame and the overall pressure of the throne.

The film also shows other raw, realistic components of Princess Diana’s life, such as her battle with an eating disorder. It is widely known that the Princess of Wales struggled with bulimia, also known as bulimia nervosa.

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7 Ways to Combat Imposter Syndrome

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7 Ways to Combat Imposter Syndrome

Do you feel like you are a fraud? Do you think that you do not belong in your position? Do you think you simply got lucky?

We’ve all been there before. No matter how hard you have worked or how many hours you put in, you may be feeling unworthy. You may feel like you are not qualified for the new job you just got hired for- afraid that your boss and colleagues will discover the “truth” at any given moment. Maybe you feel like you do not have what it takes to raise your child even though they are a priority and you are trying your best.

Please take comfort in knowing that many people have felt this way at one point or another.

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The Connection Between Binge Drinking in College and Mental Health

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The Connection Between Binge Drinking in College and Mental Health

College binge drinking has become a new norm for young adults, especially college students. The term “blackout” is widely used. “Blackout” refers to a person getting so intoxicated that they fail to remember the night’s events the following morning. Although “blacking out” is extremely dangerous and negative to one's overall health, it is a part of daily life for many college students.

It is very common for college students to participate in binge drinking, which makes this a public health issue. Alcohol is more accessible to college students than high school students because there is a mix of people who are underage but still participate in drinking and those who have turned the legal age to purchase alcohol. There is almost always free alcohol given away at college parties.

College binge drinking has been routinely highlighted in the overall college experience. A phrase used regularly is “blackout or get out” meaning that you should only be at the event if you plan on getting extremely intoxicated.

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How Euphoria Gets Mental Health Right

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How Euphoria Gets Mental Health Right

Euphoria is a groundbreaking series that reflects on the lives of teenagers in today's society. It puts an extra focus on analyzing the mental health of the show’s characters with a variety of situations influencing their mental health. It’s getting a massive audience that even crashed HBO for the viewing of the first episode of the second season.

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When is it Time to Seek Anger Management Therapy?

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When is it Time to Seek Anger Management Therapy?

Feelings of anger or violent actions can be related to many underlying mental health issues, such as depression, anxiety, or addiction problems. Some people with anger may suffer from low self-confidence, trust issues, or even have past experiences with physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. There can be overlapping factors that influence one’s anger management issues.

It is important to note that anger is a normal emotion, especially when you feel mistreated or wronged. It should not be something you hide from. In fact, you should learn to express your emotions, but they must be showcased in a healthy way that does not negatively affect other people. When you have control over your anger, you can ensure that your emotions do not get bottled up, remain calm, and learn to effectively show your emotions without harming your relationships. Anger becomes dangerous when harm is done to you or others.

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5 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

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5 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

Self-confidence can be a difficult aspect of ourselves to build up. Not everyone automatically has a high level of confidence. From generally suffering from low self-esteem to having an incident that lowered your trust in yourself, it can often be difficult to raise our confidence levels.

Self-confidence can generally be referred to as a feeling of trust you have in your abilities, judgment, and qualities. Having a good level of self-assurance is not only good for your health, but it also benefits your psychological welfare.

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How to Stop Self-Sabotaging for Good

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How to Stop Self-Sabotaging for Good

Self-sabotaging refers to specific ideals and behaviors that prevent us from being the best versions of ourselves. Contrary to popular belief, self-sabotaging is a normal part of the human experience. In other words, everyone self-sabotages at some point in time; however, some people may do it more often than others. In fact, it may become so normal to you that you do not even realize that you are self-sabotaging.

Self-sabotaging can often seem mysterious or confusing for some people. While most of us want to do well, we may find ourselves standing in our way. Luckily, there are ways to recognize the forms of self-sabotage and overcome them for good.

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How to Create Realistic New Year’s Resolutions

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How to Create Realistic New Year’s Resolutions

We all have heard the infamous saying, “New year, new me.” While having goals and positive visions for the new year is important, it is also important to create realistic expectations of yourself and your capabilities.

New Year’s resolutions are extremely personal. Some people may want to change internally. For instance, they may want to work on becoming more positive or friendly towards others. While other people's aspirations may be rooted in the external, like money or physical appearance. Having your New Year’s resolution focus on mental health and wellness is a great place to start to set the intention for a year of positive growth.

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8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

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8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.