toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling
Courtney Glashow
How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship
Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right
control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues
couples therapy, hoboken counseling, jersey city therapist, mental health blog, nyc counselor, relationship counseling
Courtney Glashow
8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist

While some people may be quick to throw the word “narcissist” around, it is important to remember that there is a distinction between someone being self-centered and unsympathetic, and someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many people may have what doctors call narcissistic characteristics, such as feeling entitled or having a strong sense of self-importance. People who have narcissistic personality disorder may be challenging to deal with.

The first step to determine your dynamic with someone who you think is a narcissist is to know the difference between someone with narcissistic tendencies and someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

8 Tips for Dealing With A Narcissist
trauma counseling, nyc counselor, nj therapist, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling
Courtney Glashow
How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

When you think of a child, you probably imagine a young person who is resilient and fast-moving. These traits may cause you to believe that situations do not leave a lasting impact on children’s emotional health; however, that is not the case. If left unsolved, your emotions that came from a traumatic experience as a child can live in your subconscious mind. This will continue to affect you until you detect, process, and solve it. In order to heal childhood trauma as an adult, you have to learn how to process painful emotions.

A healthy way to respond to childhood trauma occurs right after the trauma has taken place. When the trauma occurs, you recognize that it is an offense to yourself. Afterward, you would feel your emotions and acknowledge the fact that the offense does not dictate anything about you personally. In other words, you do not make a negative meaning out of what occurred. Generally, it is rare for people to react in this manner.

This process is not automatic. Certain emotions, like rage and unhappiness, are difficult to express. On top of that, some cultures may view this outpouring of emotions to be socially unacceptable. Therefore, this causes many people to suppress their emotions. For a kid, this process is even more burdensome. For instance, someone may comment on a child’s weight or a part of their body which can cause a long-lasting inner dialogue to occur in the kid’s head, creating body dysmorphia. While this can happen to adults as well, it may be easier for an adult to push aside outside commentary in comparison to a child.

How to Heal Childhood Trauma as an Adult

mental health hoboken nj

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How Mental Health Counseling Can Help Your Decision Fatigue

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How Mental Health Counseling Can Help Your Decision Fatigue

Hot or iced coffee? Paper or plastic straw? Debit card or credit card? Take the train or drive to work? Take the stairs or take the elevator? It is estimated that the average adult makes 35,000 conscious decisions every single day according to PBS News. Out of those estimated 35,000 decisions, not all of them are straightforward. 

At times, your decisions may be more difficult ones. For instance, maybe you and your partner are deciding if you should move in with one another. If you are in this position, read our blog “How To Know If It’s The Right Time To Move In With Your Partner.” On the other hand, maybe you are deciding if your teen should remain in public school or apply for admission to a private high school. Check out our blog “How To Support Your Teen Through High School and College Application Anxiety.”

The amount of decisions you have to make and the complexity of those choices can leave you feeling emotionally, mentally, and physically depleted. It can do this so much that a simple question like “Do you want a soda or water with your dinner?” feels like an impossible riddle to solve. If this is resonating with you, you may be dealing with decision fatigue.

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Swipe Smart: Navigating Online Dating and Mental Health with Dating Therapy

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Swipe Smart: Navigating Online Dating and Mental Health with Dating Therapy

In a world of swiping left and right on dating apps, it is easy to think that the love of your life could be right at your fingertips. However, if you are someone who is on a dating app, you may have found out the reality that it is not that easy to find your person whether you are looking for something casual, a short-term relationship, or your forever partner.

In other words, modern dating presents its fair share of challenges. There are the practical challenges, such as cycling through the various dating apps, finding compatible people in your area, and carving out the time in your schedule to genuinely connect with others. Then, there are the more emotionally-charged problems, like ghosting, love bombing, and even seeing things take a turn for the ugly when you reject a person.

Instead of waiting around for Mr. Right or Mrs. Right, you can take control of your happiness now by meeting with a dating therapist and continuing to read this helpful blog!

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Find Out If You’re An Introvert or Extrovert

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Find Out If You’re An Introvert or Extrovert

From the Myers Briggs Type Indicator to the Enneagram, there are many personality tests out there that can reveal more about you. Learning more about your personality can be a powerful tool.

Personality tests can provide many advantages, such as:

  • Being able to understand yourself better

  • Helping you choose what path of study you want to pursue

  • Helping you pick a career that suits your interests

  • Enhancing your management skills

  • Teaching you healthy coping mechanisms

  • Making you more empathetic

  • Gaining insight into your mental health

More generally, personality tests can increase your level of self-awareness and help nurture important relationships in your life. A major component of almost all personality tests is whether you are more introverted or more extroverted.

Most likely, you know what side of the spectrum you are on by simply noting if you are more outgoing or shy in your everyday life. However, personality tests can offer more definitive answers. The question of whether you are an extrovert or introvert is more complex than simply being demonstrative or timid.

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7 Ways to Combat Imposter Syndrome

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7 Ways to Combat Imposter Syndrome

Do you feel like you are a fraud? Do you think that you do not belong in your position? Do you think you simply got lucky?

We’ve all been there before. No matter how hard you have worked or how many hours you put in, you may be feeling unworthy. You may feel like you are not qualified for the new job you just got hired for- afraid that your boss and colleagues will discover the “truth” at any given moment. Maybe you feel like you do not have what it takes to raise your child even though they are a priority and you are trying your best.

Please take comfort in knowing that many people have felt this way at one point or another.

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5 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

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5 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

Self-confidence can be a difficult aspect of ourselves to build up. Not everyone automatically has a high level of confidence. From generally suffering from low self-esteem to having an incident that lowered your trust in yourself, it can often be difficult to raise our confidence levels.

Self-confidence can generally be referred to as a feeling of trust you have in your abilities, judgment, and qualities. Having a good level of self-assurance is not only good for your health, but it also benefits your psychological welfare.

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Anxiety: Why It Can Be Different for Men

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Anxiety: Why It Can Be Different for Men

We are living in the age of anxiety. People are stressed in every sphere of their lives and there are new challenges everyday related to our jobs and our relationships with friends and family.

Anxiety actually has a purpose. Its natural function is to alert us to potential threats that allows us to evaluate and respond to them in appropriate ways. Anxiety can help us perform better and can stimulate creativity and action. Anxiety can actually be rewarding: putting oneself in a situation that may be terrifying initially, but powering through often comes with great rewards.

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4 Ways to Celebrate Self-Improvement Month

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4 Ways to Celebrate Self-Improvement Month

Happy Self-Improvement Month! Self-Improvement Month takes place every September. Generally, everyone wants to improve themselves in some way, shape, or form and this month presents itself as the perfect opportunity to do so. One of the best aspects of self-improvement is that it can be uniquely tailored to fit your needs. In other words, it can take on different forms and have distinct meanings for each person!

From a young age, we are taught to do well in our schoolwork and extracurricular activities. As we get older, these responsibilities shift to a larger scale- from paying bills to raising children. It can often seem like you prioritize your responsibilities over your own mental and physical well-being. It is important to know that, regardless of your age or obligations, self-improvement and personal development should never be paused.

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Starting A Conversation About Mental Health with Simone Biles and Naomi Osaka

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Starting A Conversation About Mental Health with Simone Biles and Naomi Osaka

The world experienced an alarming and devastating international health crisis known as COVID-19 or Coronavirus. While this pandemic was consistently reported on, there was another catastrophe taking place at the same time- a mental health crisis. It was common for people to experience anxiety due to COVID-19 and its unknown long-term effects. If you need assistance managing post-pandemic anxiety, check out our past blog post, “How To Return To ‘Normal’ With Post Pandemic Anxiety”. Understandably, the pandemic has impacted each one of our lives in unique ways. We have had to respond to stressful and overwhelming situations that have caused troubling emotions. Luckily, we all can cope with stress in a healthy way which can make us more resilient.

Within recent years, there has been a widespread movement to dissolve the negative connotation surrounding mental health. Compassion, education, and personal attitudes towards mental health have successfully confronted the mental health stigma. The mental health stigma has been addressed and challenged by many, including athletes. Recently, Simone Biles, an American gymnast, and Naomi Osaka, a Japanese professional tennis player, have opened the doors for open conservations surrounding mental health. The brave decision on behalf of both of these women is actively altering the ‘norms’ of professional sports and people with celebrity status.

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5 Ways Exercise Benefits Your Mental Health

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5 Ways Exercise Benefits Your Mental Health

Typically, when you think of exercise, the physical benefits of movement immediately come to mind. It is known that regular exercise can help you:

  • Control your weight

  • Reduce your risk of diabetes

  • Lower your blood pressure

  • Increase your energy

In addition to these amazing advantages, did you know that exercise has psychological benefits as well?

Regular exercise has been proven to keep your memory sharp and ease symptoms of depression and anxiety. Lifestyle modifications are often used to improve quality of life and overall health, and exercise is no exception to these adjustments. Lifestyle changes that highlight moderate-intensity activity are the most beneficial. Additionally, the positive effects of movement on mental health encompass self-efficacy, social interaction, and distraction. Exercise has the ability to enhance your self-efficacy, also known as the belief in your capabilities. Movement can act as a form of social interaction in various ways. For instance, you may have a ‘workout buddy’ or you may engage in group classes. Lastly, exercise can act as a distraction from life stressors, giving you much needed time to mentally rejuvenate.

If you would like to learn about the mental health benefits of exercise, keep reading!

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Anchor Therapy Is Expanding Counseling Services in Hoboken, NJ!

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Anchor Therapy Is Expanding Counseling Services in Hoboken, NJ!

At Anchor Therapy, we are currently accepting new clients and are now providing telehealth (video & phone) sessions for residents of New Jersey and New York as well as in-person sessions at our new office in downtown Hoboken, NJ! Anchor Therapy is a counseling center in Hoboken, NJ with psychotherapists specialized in helping children, teens, adults, and couples with anxiety, depression, relationship issues, trauma, substance abuse, addiction, identity, and life transitions.

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How To Return To "Normal" With Post Pandemic Anxiety

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How To Return To "Normal" With Post Pandemic Anxiety

As we are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel with the COVID-19 pandemic some people are starting to experience anxiety about having to return to their “normal” life. Since the pandemic lasted over a year, a lot of people have adjusted to a new normal that they’re now comfortable with. Because we have been told to stay home more and physically socially distance from others, it has led to people spending more and more time with the family they live with and people in their quarantine bubble. A lot of people had the luxury of working from home or anywhere that they can get access to WiFi. This led many people to move to a new location since they could truly work from anywhere. Now that millions of Americans are getting vaccinated, businesses and people in general are starting to discuss how they will operate after the COVID-19 is no longer a high risk. The thought about returning to normal has caused many people to feel anxious about making this transition.

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7 Mental Health Tips For Getting Through Election Season

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7 Mental Health Tips For Getting Through Election Season

As a therapist, I have been seeing an increase in anxiety and stress due to the election season. With election day coming up, a lot of people are feeling scared, hopeless, nervous, angry, confused, and are experiencing relationship issues with others who oppose their views. All of these feelings are very normal and valid to have right now. If you are experiencing anxiety or stress due to the election, below are some tips to take that could help you get through each day. These tips are not meant to replace your need to take action during this time or to blind you from what is happening in our political climate right now. The goal here is to create awareness if are feeling overwhelmed and to take some time to better your mental health along the way.