April 10, 2024

Scapegoating in Families, family counseling, Hoboken NJ therapist, Jersey City NJ therapist, hudson county therapist

Courtney Glashow

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in ...

Scapegoating means that you are blaming a person or group for something bad that has happened or for something that someone else has done. Scapegoating typically occurs to protect the image of a person or family. In a family dynamic, a person may be used as the scapegoat to protect a more favored member in the family. While it is common for one person to be used as the scapegoat, it can happen to multiple people.

Scapegoating can occur in different environments, such as work, but it is most prominent in unhealthy family dynamics. In this case, scapegoating then tends to start in childhood when a child is blamed for all of a family’s dysfunction and problems. A scapegoat bears the burden of taking on the mistakes of a family or team.

When children are assigned this role at a young age, it can wreak havoc on their mental health. A scapegoated child may not believe that they are inherently good, worthy, or lovable. Instead, they hear insults regularly, experience constant bullying, and even abuse and neglect. This leads to a low self-esteem, decreased self-confidence, and negative self-talk.

Understanding the Psychology of Scapegoating in Families

February 5, 2024

love bombing, nyc therapist, relationship counseling

Courtney Glashow

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

Love bombing is a specific type of emotional abuse. It is a tactic where someone will “bomb” you with extreme displays of affection and attention. While it may seem like this person has fallen head over heels and madly in love with you, there is a darker truth to the matter. A love bomber is using their grand gestures with the intent of manipulating you.

Being showered with love and affection can feel good and even positive at the very beginning of the relationship, but it can lead to serious issues down the road, like gaslighting and abuse. Love bombing is a very common tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths in relationships so they can control you.

Overcoming the Aftermath of Love Bombing

December 14, 2022

toxic relationship, relationship counseling, couples therapy, hoboken therapist, jersey city therapist, marriage counseling, nj therapist, nyc therapist, premarital counseling

Courtney Glashow

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

When you are in a healthy relationship, it naturally functions well. Of course, like any couple, you may have disagreements from time-to-time or there may be some hard times, but you band together no matter what. You are able to make major life decisions together, discuss problems once they occur, and genuinely enjoy spending time with one another.

On the other hand, you have toxic relationships. In a toxic relationship, the ‘norm’ is feeling drained and unhappy after spending time with your partner. This should be a major red flag that some things need to change.

You may still love your partner, but the relationship does not seem enjoyable. Maybe minor issues turn into full-blown arguments or you always seem to provoke one another. It may even get so severe that you dread spending time with your partner instead of getting excited to see them, like you were in the past.

Continue reading this blog to see if your relationship is toxic, and some guidance on how to navigate a toxic relationship.

How To Tell If You’re In A Toxic Relationship

September 14, 2022

Intergenerational Trauma, trauma counseling, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling

Courtney Glashow

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational ...

Disney has a way of exploring heavier life topics that can help children and the 2021 film Encanto is no exception. Movies like Inside Out and Soul also assist children in exploring heavier aspects of life, such as emotions, trauma, consciousness, and even death. Encanto joins the long list of children’s movies that have a deeper message.

Disney’s Encanto offers a multigenerational story about a grandmother and her family who have been endowed with magical gifts. The Madrigal family lives in a hidden village in Colombia. While each family member does their best to live up to their reputation and help others in the community, the facade slowly begins to crumble figuratively and literally in the house that all three generations share.
Not only do people love this movie because of its catchy soundtrack, including the famous song “We don’t talk about Bruno”, but people also love it because of its exploration of generational trauma.

Disney’s Encanto: How It Got Intergenerational Trauma Right

July 13, 2022

control issues, mental health blog, jersey city therapist, hoboken counseling

Courtney Glashow

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

Do you have a hard time going with the flow? Do you have to follow a schedule or routine at all times? Do you try to control other people in your life? If you are dealing with control issues, it is likely that you feel like you must exert power over your life, relationships, and general environment. In some cases, this exertion of power may extend to the life of other people.

Control can simply be defined as exerting influence or power over the environment, actions, and behaviors of yourself or another person. There are many reasons why you may feel like you need to be in control, such as insecurities or fear of the unpredictable. At times, your need for control may become overwhelming and tiring, causing chaos in your career, relationships, and your overall quality of life.

7 Ways to Let Go of Control Issues

hoboken counseling

How To Cope With Mommy Guilt

How To Cope With Mommy Guilt

What is mommy guilt? It is when a mom has a feeling of shame while away from her children. There is a feeling of FOMO (fear of missing out) while spending time away from your family. It could be that you’re at work, spending time with friends, traveling without your children, going on errands around town, a date with your partner, etc. Mommy guilt is a common feeling that most moms get, especially with a newborn. Mommy guilt can also be seen as a kind of anxious/nervous feeling that you cannot shake and always remains under the surface. Mommy guilt can stand in your way of the self-care that you need.

Postpartum Depression: How Netflix's 'Workin' Moms' Got It Right

Postpartum Depression: How Netflix's 'Workin' Moms' Got It Right

If you are a mom, or soon-to-be mom, then you have to watch Netflix’s new show, “Workin’ Moms”. As a warning The show has a lot of dry humor, but most moms find at least one character or incident extremely relatable. The show follows a few moms who are all working and balancing their family life, raising a newborn, and returning to work after maternity leave. As a psychotherapist who helps a lot of moms in Hoboken, NJ, there is one character that intrigued me the most. In the show she recently had a baby and is experiencing postpartum depression. This may be one of the most realistic portrayals of postpartum depression that I have seen on a TV show.

The One Thing You Should Remove From Your Diet To Feel Less Anxious

The One Thing You Should Remove From Your Diet To Feel Less Anxious

Everyone feels anxious at different points in their lives. If you find yourself feeling anxious, stressed, nervous, or on-edge most days then you are probably looking to make a change. If you find that your anxious feelings are impacting your life in a huge way then you may want to seek professional help from a counselor. If you find yourself feeling anxious some days but it is mostly manageable then you can make a few changes on your own. As a psychotherapist, I always ask my clients the amount of caffeine they consume daily. It is common that a lot of adults consume a lot of coffee, tea, and sugar throughout their day. Caffeine is the first thing I tell my anxious clients to try decreasing, or cutting out of their diet, to see if that helps decrease their anxious symptoms.